It’s time for the infamous (and arguably most anticipated party of the year) sex party, thrown by Eclectic, which tones down its party themes from last year with “PERIOD SEX.” (Remember Hillary Clinton’s Hidden Vagenda?)
Here’s the info from Sam Ottinger ’09:
You’ve been waiting with baited breath and, yes, it’s finally that time of the month. Powder your wigs, wax your merkins, juice your loins, and grease your members; the Eclectic Sex Party is only a reach around away! But what is the theme you passionately cry!?! Why it’s Period Sex, only one entendre short of an ménage a trois. Recall if you will the Marquis de Sade ramming his piece into Anne-Prospere and Robespierre reigning his terror into Marie Antoinette’s bloody gash, while Louis XIV steadies the webcam – and Lady Macbeth really meaning it as she shrieks “Out, damn spot!”
If you think you can bear the brutal and incessant ravaging that is period sex please join us in your favorite ‘period piece’ 10pm-2am on September 20th.
The Rules:
a) No containers in the house.
s) Dress to get fucked. We will personally engulf every last inch of you.
s) Bring single dollars. There will be pay-to-play tricks and treats.
s) Tickets will be sold IN ADVANCE ONLY. Wednesday ($6), Thursday ($6), and Friday ($7), lunchtime and dinnertime at Oozedan.
e) re-entry prohibited except up the corn-hole
x) Without a ticket and a valid College ID, we will be tearfully unable to let you and your friends into our moist, milky wormhole that is Eclectic Haus.Give us your best, and we’ll give you everything we’ve got, forever. Prepare for rug-burning Neanderthal cybersex at the event horizon of a universal orgasm, but real, with Crisco.
xoxo,
Eclectic
Phi Nu Theta
update: there was a lot of sex at that party. maybe too much. gross!!!
update: there was a lot of sex at that party. maybe too much. gross!!!
update: there was a lot of sex at that party. maybe too much. gross!!!
are there really only 27 tickets left……whattt?
are there really only 27 tickets left……whattt?
are there really only 27 tickets left……whattt?
YA! seriously, there is nothing worse than self-respect. Fuck those kids should be sucking my dick and thanking me at the same time for attending their stupid party that they only hold because they are so smug.
YA! seriously, there is nothing worse than self-respect. Fuck those kids should be sucking my dick and thanking me at the same time for attending their stupid party that they only hold because they are so smug.
YA! seriously, there is nothing worse than self-respect. Fuck those kids should be sucking my dick and thanking me at the same time for attending their stupid party that they only hold because they are so smug.
Fuck the hataz PHI NU THETA
Fuck the hataz PHI NU THETA
Fuck the hataz
PHI NU THETA
10:36: Uhhhhhh pot, the kettle is on the phone…Anyways, you know Eclectic doesn’t hoard money, they just spend it on events for the student body like open house and concerts and shit, I don’t get why no one realizes that.
10:36: Uhhhhhh pot, the kettle is on the phone…Anyways, you know Eclectic doesn’t hoard money, they just spend it on events for the student body like open house and concerts and shit, I don’t get why no one realizes that.
10:36: Uhhhhhh pot, the kettle is on the phone…
Anyways, you know Eclectic doesn’t hoard money, they just spend it on events for the student body like open house and concerts and shit, I don’t get why no one realizes that.
This announcement needs either more innuendo or more cowbell. I’m not sure which it is.WTF, Wes? WTF?
This announcement needs either more innuendo or more cowbell. I’m not sure which it is.WTF, Wes? WTF?
This announcement needs either more innuendo or more cowbell. I’m not sure which it is.
WTF, Wes? WTF?
Eclectic is tailored to freshmen who don’t know any better, and it is lame as hell.Period sex! HaHa! We’re in college and we’re talking about being SLUTTY and doing DIRTY things that are RISQUE. You sure couldn’t do THIS in high school.Are you kidding me? I got drunk and had a lot of sex when I was at Wesleyan, and I never had fun at Eclectic. Not because I came in not wanting to have fun, but because the amount of smug self-respect got in the way.
Eclectic is tailored to freshmen who don’t know any better, and it is lame as hell.Period sex! HaHa! We’re in college and we’re talking about being SLUTTY and doing DIRTY things that are RISQUE. You sure couldn’t do THIS in high school.Are you kidding me? I got drunk and had a lot of sex when I was at Wesleyan, and I never had fun at Eclectic. Not because I came in not wanting to have fun, but because the amount of smug self-respect got in the way.
Eclectic is tailored to freshmen who don’t know any better, and it is lame as hell.
Period sex! HaHa! We’re in college and we’re talking about being SLUTTY and doing DIRTY things that are RISQUE. You sure couldn’t do THIS in high school.
Are you kidding me? I got drunk and had a lot of sex when I was at Wesleyan, and I never had fun at Eclectic. Not because I came in not wanting to have fun, but because the amount of smug self-respect got in the way.
fucking awesome
fucking awesome
fucking awesome
fucking gross
fucking gross
fucking gross
something tells me there will be no real sex at this party.
something tells me there will be no real sex at this party.
something tells me there will be no real sex at this party.
Ummm…no Crisco with the condoms, please. Breakage will abound.
Ummm…no Crisco with the condoms, please. Breakage will abound.
Ummm…no Crisco with the condoms, please. Breakage will abound.
no one is making you go, but you know this shit is always crazy fun. also, thats a pretty awesome write-up of the event.
no one is making you go, but you know this shit is always crazy fun. also, thats a pretty awesome write-up of the event.
no one is making you go, but you know this shit is always crazy fun.
also, thats a pretty awesome write-up of the event.
Seriously, the only person getting fucked up the ass here is the student body.
Seriously, the only person getting fucked up the ass here is the student body.
Seriously, the only person getting fucked up the ass here is the student body.
$6? Seriously?
$6? Seriously?
$6? Seriously?