Usdan/ResLife Alert: Plant Thief Strikes Again

Not to strike significant fear into those living with plants, but… Save your Significant Others, Children, and Wildlife.

Fran Koerting, Director of Residential Life, recently sent out an email to all ResLife Staff(@lyris.wesleyan.edu) to be on the lookout for a plant and plant thief. While I am completely unrelated to ResLife, and so sadly was not a recipient, I felt like sharing it…

“The Usdan University Center has had a second plant stolen this year.  If a plant that matches this description should show up in one of the student residences, please let us know.  Thanks for your help.
According to Frank Marselli [Facility and Events Manager for the Usdan Center, whose name is actually spelled “Marsilli”], It is a 6’ Mass Cane plant in a Golden Bronze fiberglass container.  The plant itself has four large bark covered stems.  From only the top portions of each stem emerge several tufts of large green leaves.  It was taken from the Gregory Family Lounge area on the first floor of Usdan.  It was here on Friday, but not here this morning.   The plant’s value was $145, and the container’s cost was $95.”

Rumor has it the plant was approached in its residence by several people wearing hoodies. Be on the lookout for groups of people in hoodies carrying their 6-foot tall, hoodie-wearing, camouflaged “friend” around campus; they may be costing you and 239 of your Facebook-friends $1 each in tuition. As if the upcoming GRS process wasn’t enough for ResLife to worry us about…

Again:

What: Burglary/Theft
When: Last weekend, between Friday, April 3rd and Monday, April 6th
Where: Usdan – Gregory Family Lounge area

For real though: People stole two large plants out of Usdan without anybody noticing. Not to overreact, but let this remind you that you should report it to p-safe if you see this sort of theft (or fkoerting@wes if it is this plant) and you should look out for your own stuff; while odds are high that nobody is going to try to steal your Bonsai Tree, remember that we don’t have constant surveillance and clean break-ins can happen.

And (assuming it isn’t part of well-executed and worthwhile prank), try to keep your Usdan thefts to silverware and the occasional chair.

34 thoughts on “Usdan/ResLife Alert: Plant Thief Strikes Again

  1. Anonymous

    seriously though, are u seriously advocating snitching?

    we don’t like no snitches.

  2. Anonymous

    seriously though, are u seriously advocating snitching?

    we don’t like no snitches.

  3. Anonymous

    You’ve got to wonder, though, why did Wes spend so much money on a damn plant to begin with? (Not that I think this justifies stealing it)

  4. Anonymous

    You’ve got to wonder, though, why did Wes spend so much money on a damn plant to begin with? (Not that I think this justifies stealing it)

  5. Anonymous

    You’ve got to wonder, though, why did Wes spend so much money on a damn plant to begin with? (Not that I think this justifies stealing it)

  6. Anonymous

    might be hard to believe, but Wesleyan paid for that plant and will probably pay for a replacement. Which means that somewhere, there’s money being used for this that could have gone somewhere else more useful to everyone. Thanks, dick.

  7. Anonymous

    might be hard to believe, but Wesleyan paid for that plant and will probably pay for a replacement. Which means that somewhere, there’s money being used for this that could have gone somewhere else more useful to everyone. Thanks, dick.

  8. Anonymous

    might be hard to believe, but Wesleyan paid for that plant and will probably pay for a replacement. Which means that somewhere, there’s money being used for this that could have gone somewhere else more useful to everyone. Thanks, dick.

  9. David Post author

    Beau – I had typed lyrics. I fixed it and then went to sleep – forgot to note the change.

  10. Anonymous

    this post made me laugh out loud, and i’m usually stoic as a plant trapped in glass. above commenter is clearly a huge nerd and was probably the hall monitor in middle school.

  11. Anonymous

    this post made me laugh out loud, and i’m usually stoic as a plant trapped in glass. above commenter is clearly a huge nerd and was probably the hall monitor in middle school.

  12. Anonymous

    this post made me laugh out loud, and i’m usually stoic as a plant trapped in glass. above commenter is clearly a huge nerd and was probably the hall monitor in middle school.

  13. Anonymous

    A plant got stolen, and you took the opportunity to make some jokes, spread some rumors, advocate minor theft from Usdan, and advocate reporting major thefts from Usdan to psafe. You’re sort of all over the place here.

    And I think you mean “lyris”, not “lyrics”.

  14. Anonymous

    A plant got stolen, and you took the opportunity to make some jokes, spread some rumors, advocate minor theft from Usdan, and advocate reporting major thefts from Usdan to psafe. You’re sort of all over the place here.

    And I think you mean “lyris”, not “lyrics”.

  15. Anonymous

    A plant got stolen, and you took the opportunity to make some jokes, spread some rumors, advocate minor theft from Usdan, and advocate reporting major thefts from Usdan to psafe. You’re sort of all over the place here.

    And I think you mean “lyris”, not “lyrics”.

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