This just in: Giant Joint not actually a Wes student

giant_joint_smokerHey so it turns out that despite the record-breaking turnout for Giant Joint in this election (just 4 shy of 420 votes), and what appears to be a first-time, much-deserved victory for our old friend and perennial write-in, we might have a Birther scandal on our hands. Has anyone actually seen hir certificate of enrollment? Conspiracy!

Sadly, according to WSA officials, Giant Joint may not take hir rightful place on the WSA next semester as one of the seven Members-At Large unless ze is actually an enrolled student here.

Which would create a dilemma for the WSA if someone named Giant Joint actually showed up next semester. If any of the 416 Wesleyan Green Party voters are truly committed to the cause, you will legally change your name to Giant Joint over winter break.

Yes,  GJ’s historic victory may effectively serve as a fuck-you to the student government. But if you can’t bring the establishment down from the outside, why not fuck shit up from the inside? Looking at you, human avatar of GJ’s spirit.

Also check out the full election results to see some of the more ridiculous write-ins – from many ridiculous misspellings of “giant joint”, to “giant spliff”, to “Mytheos Holt”, to “lady gaga”, it was a good semester for democracy.

14 thoughts on “This just in: Giant Joint not actually a Wes student

  1. Wes '08 alumnus

    Next time you students should pick out a random person in your class and all agree to write in vote for them without their consent!

  2. Wes '08 alumnus

    Next time you students should pick out a random person in your class and all agree to write in vote for them without their consent!

  3. sahm

    why wouldn’t someone vlote for vlade divac? the man is a freakin humanitarian, adored in his native land of Serbia, as well as the neighboring region of Republika Srpska.

    I say next semester, we launch into an immediate PRESIDENTIAL campaign for Vlade Divac, as well as a concurrent campaign to get him (re)instated as a wesleyan student.

  4. sahm

    why wouldn’t someone vlote for vlade divac? the man is a freakin humanitarian, adored in his native land of Serbia, as well as the neighboring region of Republika Srpska.

    I say next semester, we launch into an immediate PRESIDENTIAL campaign for Vlade Divac, as well as a concurrent campaign to get him (re)instated as a wesleyan student.

  5. Sheek Post author

    Ok despite lacking human form, GJ’s enROLLment is definitely the official argument for valid service

  6. Braille

    enrollment.
    THINK ABOUT IT.
    enROLLment
    of courrrse giant joint is ENROLLED, how could it be otherwise?

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