A love poem for that cute Kosher girl

We all know that cute blonde girl behind the Kosher counter at Usdan, who until recently served us our burritos (without cheese) and other food with a smile.  Some take the time to make flirtatious small talk with her (which she politely ignores), but Freshman David Nam (’13) decided to take it to the next level and write her a love poem.

Keep at it Cassanova, girls love this kind of stuff. Maybe you can grow up to be like this guy:

Here it is – beauty in verse:

Ode To Usdan Lady by David Nam

You are the one that rocks my world

I can’t get enough of you Usdan girl

My day is filled with joy and elation

When I see you behind that kosher station

You’re like a perfectly made soft serve with rainbow sprinkles

Your beauty will last forever, even when you have wrinkles

I’m a victim to you like imperialism and Belgium Congo

It’s got to be the way you work at the Mongo

Every Monday you ask me chicken or steak

You take my friends veggies and I feel my heart break

Because we go together like weed and a Rasta

Dressing with salad, or pink sauce with pasta

Without you I’m empty like an empty basket of cones

So go refill that shit or I’ll be all alone

The best is that you’re not fake; No MSG, no silicon, no plastic

You’re the one I’ll always take, just like the Classics

46 thoughts on “A love poem for that cute Kosher girl

  1. jofn

    all wesylan kids think they got a chance with these girls who obviously dont give a fuck about them grow up and get a fucking life

  2. jofn

    all wesylan kids think they got a chance with these girls who obviously dont give a fuck about them grow up and get a fucking life

  3. anon

    I agree with #13. I think the blonde “kosher girl” is referring to wendy’s daughter amanda. see I actually know her, what now jealous bitchez!!

  4. anon

    I agree with #13. I think the blonde “kosher girl” is referring to wendy’s daughter amanda. see I actually know her, what now jealous bitchez!!

  5. ++++

    Um, #15, they serve both veggie and real hot dogs at the Kosher station. And yes, both types are kosher.
    – Not #9

  6. ++++

    Um, #15, they serve both veggie and real hot dogs at the Kosher station. And yes, both types are kosher.
    – Not #9

  7. anon

    I don’t think the kid meant it as anything more than a silly confession of his crush on her. Not sure what the fuss is about.

  8. anon

    I don’t think the kid meant it as anything more than a silly confession of his crush on her. Not sure what the fuss is about.

  9. anon

    Between Ben Bernstein’s super pretentious music shit and now posts like this, Wesleying has turned into one of the dumbest news outlets on campus. Pretty soon I might need to…start reading the argus…

  10. anon

    Between Ben Bernstein’s super pretentious music shit and now posts like this, Wesleying has turned into one of the dumbest news outlets on campus. Pretty soon I might need to…start reading the argus…

  11. Mad

    this is still creepy in the real world, too.

    Kosher girl, you have always been nice and served me well, and always remembered that I like my veggie hot dogs with no ketchup. Ignore the creeps!

  12. Mad

    this is still creepy in the real world, too.

    Kosher girl, you have always been nice and served me well, and always remembered that I like my veggie hot dogs with no ketchup. Ignore the creeps!

  13. big bird

    anyone who thinks this is offensive seriously needs to lighten up. enjoy going into the real world and realizing that the wesleyan bubble is radically different from how things actually work.

  14. big bird

    anyone who thinks this is offensive seriously needs to lighten up. enjoy going into the real world and realizing that the wesleyan bubble is radically different from how things actually work.

  15. whatshername

    Geez, she sounds like the perfect girl- blonde, politely accepts harassment because she has to do her job, and your interactions with her are limited to her serving you.

    If you’re reading this, “Kosher girl,” please tell us your name and how many ridiculously awkward interactions you’ve had with Wesleyan guys. Dish the 411!

  16. whatshername

    Geez, she sounds like the perfect girl- blonde, politely accepts harassment because she has to do her job, and your interactions with her are limited to her serving you.

    If you’re reading this, “Kosher girl,” please tell us your name and how many ridiculously awkward interactions you’ve had with Wesleyan guys. Dish the 411!

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