R.I.P. Green Monster, 2001-2010

It saw a flurry of new numbers during freshman orientation, back when I tacked on “Wes” to the end of every new person’s name in my contacts. It was the device I used when I called my mom to tell her I got into Wesleyan. It received text messages about  senior cocktail after parties. And it was manufactured when the Backstreet Boys were still a commercial success.

Yes, the monstrosity depicted in the photo at left is my cell phone. Well, it was–until an unfortunate collision with a hardwood floor last weekend left it gasping for service. Despite having sustained countless violent blows in the past nine years (once I accidentally flung it down a stairwell), it has finally, sadly, succumbed to the technological obsoleteness that probably should have claimed it before I reached high school.

The Green Monster, as I affectionately called it, thrived at Wesleyan. Especially in the past year, responses to its continuing functionality were overwhelmingly positive. In this age of iPhones and Droids, it’s certainly unusual to see a phone that looks like something a five-year-old would expect to find in a toy shop.

If you need me, I’ll be at the Verizon store by the Goodwill. The thing I end up with will probably fold in half in a fancy way, will feature games other than Brick Attack, and will break before my 2-year contract is up.

24 thoughts on “R.I.P. Green Monster, 2001-2010

  1. sahm

    long live the green monster. I guess we can still play games with it. Like kick the phone.

    I agree with brian papish/richard. phone clogging is seriously upsetting

  2. sahm

    long live the green monster. I guess we can still play games with it. Like kick the phone.

    I agree with brian papish/richard. phone clogging is seriously upsetting

  3. Mayor McCheese

    I truly didn’t know Kyocera was capable of making such a durable phone. All of my family’s Kyocera phones were shitty, haha.

  4. Mayor McCheese

    I truly didn’t know Kyocera was capable of making such a durable phone. All of my family’s Kyocera phones were shitty, haha.

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