It’s Friday, I’m Zack (sic?), and Other Revelations

Yo, Spring Break interweb-dwellers, it’s officially Friday, Friday (fun! fun! fun! fun!), but put away your Rebecca Black, because Bar Mitzvah boy celebrity Zack Freiman has her beat in the 13-year-old music video internet phenomenon sweepstakes. Why weren’t Bar Mitzvah videos this dope back in my day (read: 2003)?

For more info on how to stay in your break-induced workless web-coma till Sunday, click on; general spring break internet treatz ‘n treasurez abound.

• You’ve seen Rebecca Black’s irresistably dreadful “Friday” video ad nauseam (Yahoo calls it mind-meltingly horrific, though I prefer to think of it as some fascinating, inadvertent excursion into piercing performance art), you’re attending the Facebook event—now check out the first ever interview with the tween pop sensation. “‘Friday’ is about hanging out with friends, having fun,” Black explains, shrugging off nasty comments from “cyberbullies” and “haters.” “I felt like it was my personality in that song.” “Friday” co-writer and Ark Music Clarence Jey chimes in too, describing Black as an “amazing singer [with] a unique tone and a fantastic fun person.” Sup, Wes Class of 2020?
• Oh yeah: apparently this song has been parodied and mocked a few times? The Daily Beast rounds up the best Rebecca Black parodies. I’m really into the Groundhog Day remix, though the Dubstep rendition may be more up your alley. Most are worth at least the 30-second intro.
• Regarding last week’s Japan tragedy: after you’ve already considering donating to one of many available relief efforts, here are some hints on how not to respond to the devastating earthquake: don’t turn water-related puns into unfathomably unfunny punchlines on your Twitter, don’t blame it on “radical Islam” or “that stuff we’re doing,” and—oh!—definitely don’t post a Facebook status incorporating the phrase “Pearl Harbor” in any nauseatingly insensitive way. [Shiver.] PS: Can you name the 7 People Most Likely To Exploit the Japan Earthquake?
• If you’re somehow, inexplicably, not yet sick of “Yonkers,” here’s a midget Tyler(?) performing the first verse last night during Odd Future’s performance at the 2011 Woodie Awards. It’s exactly what you think it is.
• If thinking up reversed movie plots in Tweet-length synopses is your thing, check out If You Watch It Backwards. Personal favorite: “If you watch Benjamin Button backwards, it is about a kid that grows old and dies.”
• …which is almost, but not quite, as cool as this photoblog—”Back To The Future”—by photographer Irina Werning, who recreates dusty old family photos with startling precision that must be seen to be believed. I’ve seen similar photoblogs before (click me, I’m relevant), but this is by far the best.
• “8 Actors Who Look Exactly The Same On Every Movie Poster,” via Cracked. Self-explanatory. On point.

Happy surfin’. And have a solid Friday. Saturday comes afterward, and Sunday after that.