BREAKING NEWS: Irene headed this way!

If you’re like me, you’ve  watched dozens of your friends try to post something refreshingly witty on their Facebook, Twitter, etc. about the impending Hurricane doom looming over New England this weekend. Or maybe, in preparation for the start up of our new academic school year, you’ve taken to the ACB–only to learn that you can’t avoid the hype of Hurricane Irene. You’ve watched helplessly as baseball games are delayed or rescheduled, flights are cancelled, and yes, the most troubling of all, International Student Orientation is postponed. Rather than welcome our new international students of the Class of 2015 to Middletown with the onslaught of Irene’s wrath, Wesleyan’s administrative titans have decided to take a rain check on the first day of Orientation. For those of us already on campus, like myself, we remain hopelessly caught in the perils of Irene’s midst, or more accurately for now, Irene’s mist. More information snarky commentary after the jump..

Yes, this Hurricane, that has everyone from Stacey Phelps to media relations director David Pesci talking, seems more akin to a Tropical Storm than a true ‘cane. Weather forecasts for Middletown predict that winds may reach over 50 mph tomorrow with over 2 inches of rainfall expected, placing Irene right smack in the middle of the range for a Tropical Storm. Call me cavalier, but we’ve seen rain before here in Middletown. Think Spring Fling, WesFest, 4/20, Zonker Harris, Senior Week, and almost every other major event it seems from this past Spring. Never fear though! Stacey Phelps and Connecticut Governor Malloy are here to help us brave the storm up in Middletown, or at least here to ask us to evacuate our residences, as Irene approaches New England. (You can also sign up to receive text alerts from the Middletown Press here.)

Middletown has actually braced itself quite well for Irene’s arrival, with an emergency shelter at Middletown High School opening at 8 p.m. tonight. Meanwhile, entire shelves at Middletown’s Stop & Shop—particularly those containing propane, bottled water, and paper towels—have been stripped bare in the hours leading up to the storm. And here at Wesleyan, we’ve been equipped with “survival packs” to avoid starvation in the 24 hour period that we may be unable to leave our residences. Who would’ve thought that a Hurricane would follow on the heels of an earthquake that rocked the East Coast just a few days ago? If my words don’t convey the true danger threatening our precious campus, then take a look at some of the slightly more ominous images from weather.com:

Boy, wouldn’t it be embarrassing for me if this thing really did hit us hard. Regardless of Irene’s Hurricane or Tropical Storm status, she will hopefully help to alleviate the issue of the lack of central air conditioning throughout campus. That’s right, Class of 2015, hope you’re ready to sweat it out with us over the next couple weeks!

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