DRUNK, S0BER, H1GH: Vice Presidential Debate Liveblog

Hello. The vice presidential debates are about to start (@9). Like last week’s presidential showdown, we’re liveblogging the action. This time there’s a twist. Inspired by NYU Local’s Drunk Sober High feature, the debate will be covered by three anonymous Wesleyingers in varying states of consciousness. p-safe will be sober(ish?). gettincrunkman will be drunk. giantepgoynte will be high. Yes, really. This will be fun! Politics! Internet! Liveblog updates past the jump:

10:38 pm gettincrunkman wrote:

signing off, lying down,

#jklol going out. hope you enjoyed!

10:36 pm gettincrunkman wrote:

he said testy! lololol

10:34 pm gettincrunkman wrote:

oh. also. more after i pee.

10:34 pm p-safe wrote:

Well, errrryone, thanks for tuning in to this stuff. It’s been spiffy.

10:34 pm gettincrunkman wrote:

i can do the whole preample to the constitution in school house rock beats: go!

We the people/ in order to form a more perfect unuion/ establish justice ensure doemstice tranquility/ provide for the common defense/ ensure the genereal welfare/and/ secure the blessings of liberty/forourselves and our posterity/ to ordain and extablish thie Constitution for the UNited States of America.

10:33 pm giantepgoynte wrote:

*Closing statement

debate is over

party time

until next time: Giant Joint for prezzy 2016

10:33 pm p-safe wrote:

DUN DUN DUN. anti boneerrr.

10:32 pm giantepgoynte wrote:

Ryan looking into the camera and into my eyes makes me uncomfortable…i have an anti-boner”

10:32 pm gettincrunkman wrote:

Wait. Someone tell me who won so I can argue with them.

10:31 pm giantepgoynte wrote:

“IS DANVILLE KENTUCKY IN THE HOUSE??? I CAAAAN’T HEEEAR YOU!!” -Ryan

10:31 pm gettincrunkman wrote:

level the playing field!! #needblind?????

10:30 pm giantepgoynte wrote:

Don’t you talk bout Biden’s mama!

10:29 pm giantepgoynte wrote:

Biden sounds like he’s tired and his bedtime is soon…waiting for his nurse to wheel him away to sleep…such sweet sweet sleep

10:29 pm p-safe wrote:

Raddatz’s “man” comment is just begging for a new Paul Ryan meme…

10:29 pm giantepgoynte wrote:

What could you bring as a man, the vice president, a human, as a Dancer?

10:28 pm gettincrunkman wrote:

Wait. I posted the wrong youtubez vidzeo earlier.  this is the one I meant to post, because gay marriage wasn’t brought up and I think someone should think baout it tonight.  JUST A SERCOND— ryan

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g1TBgcctcco

^that’s the link.

10:28 pm p-safe wrote:

OH SHIT, RYAN JUST PULLED A ROMNEY.

10:27 pm p-safe wrote:

Bottom line:

Raddatz is mahh herrrooooo.

10:27 pm giantepgoynte wrote:

Just spent a minute or so thinking about what it would look like if Ryan was surrounded by a bunch of giant blue jays and they were all throwing up in his mouth, feeding him and he was sitting there in his tighty-whiteys

 

10:26 pm gettincrunkman wrote:

look at allll the string OBAMACARE

another haiku:

I promise if y’make

less than two hundred thousand$$$$

die. biden. die die.

10:25 pm p-safe wrote:

Ryan: blah blah blah blah blah blah

10:24 pm gettincrunkman wrote:

Oh that was supposed to support local salvation armies and and and thrift shops

and I have to pee so bad I haven’t heard ONE “literally” what the heck!!!

10:23 pm gettincrunkman wrote:

Oh. What I was oging to say.  I’m not bored: but if you are! Listen to this great video and watch it too!!!! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QK8mJJJvaes

10:22 pm gettincrunkman wrote:

Next thing we know he’ll be giving shout outs to big KRIT and chairlift.

10:21 pm p-safe wrote:

Well if she’s not impressed…

10:21 pm gettincrunkman wrote:

Is anybody bored? I’m not. SCALIA SHOUT OUT

10:20 pm p-safe wrote:

Forget teaching people how to dougie.

Teach them how to condescending Biden smirk.

10:19 pm gettincrunkman wrote:

a haiku by Paul Ryan:

my bean don’t die now

help! save my baked bean! ab’rtion!

biden, die die die.

 

10:18 pm p-safe wrote:

BEAN?!?! IS THAT YOU?!?!?!?

10:17 pm gettincrunkman wrote:

MY BEAN HELPPPP.

No abortion.  Bakesd beans industry is going to take a serious hit.

10:17 pm p-safe wrote:

OH SHIT.

BEAN.

10:16 pm giantepgoynte wrote:

ryan ripping out another sob story

I DON’T GIVE A SHIT ABOUT BEANS

WHAT ARE YOU’RE POLICIES AND PLANS

 

10:16 pm p-safe wrote:

ERRRRMAAGGAAWWDDDD THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH FUN.

10:14 pm giantepgoynte wrote:

Ryan is more dodgy than a naked oiled man

10:13 pm p-safe wrote:

@giantepgoynte welcome to da bloggersphere

10:12 pm giantepgoynte wrote:

did not realize I could see what everyone else was typing until now…mind blown

10:11 pm p-safe wrote:

Tyme for another ye olde Paulle Ryaneth meme:

 

10:11 pm gettincrunkman wrote:

It’s disconcerting bouncing between foreign and domestic policy I keep thinking confusion.

10:09 pm giantepgoynte wrote:

Ryan just cornered Biden and forced him (in a way) to say that he was purposely sacrificing Afgan lifes (even if it was to save American lives, but I can already hear the soundbyte coming out)

10:08 pm gettincrunkman wrote:

“No one got pulled out that didn’t get filled in by Afghan forces.” AHHHHHH

10:06 pm giantepgoynte wrote:

Biden talks to Martha like she’s his granddaughter…”now, you talk straight with me”

10:06 pm gettincrunkman wrote:

CONCERNED ABOUT PULLING OUT.  I’m concerned about pulling out.

10:04 pm gettincrunkman wrote:

Got distracted by the “Wath the Vice Presidential Debate Live Straming” at the top of this link and then realized it’s already on the other tv…

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vwpTj_Z9v-c MIRACLE SPEECH

10:04 pm giantepgoynte wrote:

Saying when we retreat from an area let’s all of our enemy’s no when they get the green light to come on in

10:03 pm p-safe wrote:

OMFG.

Obama/Biden v. Romney/Ryan BEER PONG.

WHO WOULD WIN?

10:02 pm gettincrunkman wrote:

“This would be so much more fun if they were playing a drinking game, not us.”

10:02 pm giantepgoynte wrote:

Biden’s voice sounds like smoke going through an air conditioning unit

10:01 pm giantepgoynte wrote:

Biden…dude, you just carried on the Bush lie (we went there [not for oil])

not cool bro

10:01 pm p-safe wrote:

YouTube: Who’s winning?

#bidenwinning

10:00 pm gettincrunkman wrote:

Honestly.  Why keep bringing us down with sad things MArtha Raddatz?!  #degradealqaeda???

Did Paul Ryan just say Indians?  Paul Ryan sounds like Kurt Russell in MIracle.  I”ma find the link when I can untalicize 

9:59 pm giantepgoynte wrote:

The saddest stat of the war due to the deaths of American soldiers-rest in peace

9:59 pm p-safe wrote:

Raddatz: I’d like to move on to Afghanistan.

Ryan: Can I just…make a point…?

Raddatz: We are MOVING ON TO AFGHANISTAN.

9:57 pm giantepgoynte wrote:

If both Romney and Obama sat down and yelled out each other like this, so much more of the American populace would vote…we could see that they were human

9:57 pm gettincrunkman wrote:

Biden’s face right now.

9:56 pm p-safe wrote:

OH FUCK, NOT THE CARGO PLANES

9:56 pm giantepgoynte wrote:

you wanna get into defense now

better defend yourself before ryan jumps over the table with his smooth and hairless P90x body and kills you

 

9:56 pm gettincrunkman wrote:

My friend who’s only here to drink: “I JUST WANT TO TAKE A $*** on Paul RYAN’S FACE”

My friend who’s only here to watch: “I JUST WANT TO TAKE A $*** on Paul RYAN’S FACE”

9:55 pm p-safe wrote:

It’s gettin’ rowdy all up in this mug.

9:54 pm gettincrunkman wrote:

Tax the wealthy more please Biden you tell him!

9:54 pm p-safe wrote:

“Mitt Romney: he didn’t compromise principles” — Paul Ryan

9:53 pm p-safe wrote:

Biden to Ryan: NOT MATHEMATICALLY POSSIBLE. IT HAS NEVER BEEN DONE BEFORE.

9:53 pm gettincrunkman wrote:

Ronald I mean Ryan I mean Tip O’Neill I mean Jack Kennedy.  Whose tunnel am I in?

9:53 pm giantepgoynte wrote:

Biden’s death glare vs. Ryan’s Bicep

GO

9:52 pm giantepgoynte wrote:

Romnulus and R…dunno how to make Ryan form into Remus

 

9:52 pm p-safe wrote:

Romney? I thought his name was Ronald!

9:51 pm giantepgoynte wrote:

#bidenspeaksryanbettersohecantranslate

9:51 pm giantepgoynte wrote:

“Different than this administration, we actually want to have big Bi-partisan decisions”

his nose just grew, his pants caught on fire, and the Biden’s Death glare was the worst of all of it

9:51 pm p-safe wrote:

MARTHAMARTHAMARTHAMARTHAMARTHA

9:51 pm gettincrunkman wrote:

OH SHIT MARTHA RADDITZ IS CONTINUING TO DO AN EXCELLENT JOB DOING SO MANY THINGS LIKE MODERATING AND KEEPING THEM IN CONTROL #takethatlehrer

9:50 pm p-safe wrote:

OH SHIT

OH SHIT

OH SHIT

MARTHA

HOLY SHIT MARTHA

9:50 pm p-safe wrote:

Snaps to @giantepgoynte who posted almost exactly the same thing as me at the same time.

Except sort of not really.

Except pretty much.

#props

9:49 pm p-safe wrote:

OH SHIT, RYAN JUST ADDRESSED THE AUDIENCE.

HE BROKE THE MOTHERFUCKING FOURTH WALL.

9:49 pm giantepgoynte wrote:

OH SHIT, RYAN JUST CALLED OUT THE MIDDLE CLASS

BETTER FUCKING WATCH THE FUCK OUT MIDDLE KIDS

 

9:48 pm p-safe wrote:

I’m sorry, I can’t resist.

9:48 pm gettincrunkman wrote:

Sorry sorry sorry vodka cider just got dumped on my bed I had to cleannnnn

9:48 pm giantepgoynte wrote:

God, Ryan is so fuckin smug

9:46 pm p-safe wrote:

Yeah….drink to the 800 MILLION BILLION DOLLARS.

9:46 pm giantepgoynte wrote:

800 MILLION BILLION DOLLARS

 

9:46 pm p-safe wrote:

Drink every time Biden or Ryan accuses their opponent of using inaccurate/wrong statistics.

9:45 pm giantepgoynte wrote:

Ryan is using some bullshit pot-shots but that’s great because it makes this way more entertaining than the calm and collected president debate

 

9:44 pm p-safe wrote:

Martha.

She’s so cool.

9:42 pm giantepgoynte wrote:

“Back when I was your age, Sunny, we didn’t have the internet and burgers were 5 for a nickel!

9:41 pm p-safe wrote:

The Medicare Donut Hole:

My kind of doughnut hole:

9:41 pm giantepgoynte wrote:

ARE YOU GONNA DENY SOME OF DESE CHOICES???? HUH? HUH? THAT’S WHAT I THOUGHT

 

9:41 pm giantepgoynte wrote:

Biden don’t give no shits when it comes to interupting…no shits fo you

9:40 pm gettincrunkman wrote:

They do nottt like each other. ah!

9:40 pm giantepgoynte wrote:

The fact checkers are going to have a field day

9:40 pm giantepgoynte wrote:

Ryan talks to Biden like it’s his demented Grandapa

Biden is a demented grandpa

 

9:39 pm gettincrunkman wrote:

This guy’s a senator. Thoughts?

9:38 pm giantepgoynte wrote:

Who do you believe?

Folks, follow your instincts on this one

9:38 pm p-safe wrote:

AMA. AARP. BRB. ROFL.

DUN DUN DUN THE DOUGHNUT HOLE.

9:37 pm p-safe wrote:

Wayne Ng ’16: “I’M SICK OF THESE POLITICAL FACTS. I WANT YOUTUBE TO SHOW MORE TWEETS.”

9:37 pm giantepgoynte wrote:

The donut hole

9:36 pm giantepgoynte wrote:

9:36 pm giantepgoynte wrote:

Of course ryan brought out the money taken from medicare to Obamacare when he doesn’t reveal that that same money is going to help the elderly in the new program…

 

9:36 pm gettincrunkman wrote:

Holy crap i just spiked cider is deliciousss

also drink: Ryan talking about his mommy.  Anyone know if she’s a milf/??

9:35 pm p-safe wrote:

DUDE RADDATZ IS MOVING ON. FUCK YEAH.

9:34 pm giantepgoynte wrote:

Biden is scaring me and there’s still miles between us

 

9:34 pm p-safe wrote:

I could Paul Ryan meme this bitch all day errr day.

9:33 pm giantepgoynte wrote:

Ryan caught with stimulus money!!! SHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT GOT EM

9:33 pm p-safe wrote:

Biden’s face when Ryan speaks: Yeahhhh right, you crazy asshole…

Ryan’s face when Biden speaks: I love puppies. ALSO KNOWN AS THIS FACE:

9:33 pm giantepgoynte wrote:

“When can you get it under 6%?” -Raddatz

“That’s what our plan is about! distration distraction…”- Ryan

9:31 pm giantepgoynte wrote:

They talk about this great recession as if it fell….wait…what’s that…NO NO NONONOOOOOOOOO!!!! The Recession is Falling!

 

9:31 pm gettincrunkman wrote:

I’m afraid Joe Biden’s gonna cry right now please give him a hug.

9:30 pm p-safe wrote:

Wait, when did we get from talking about the economy to a Romney love fest?

Ryan: SOMETIMES, THE WORDS DON’T COME OUT OF YOUR MOUTH THE RIGHT WAY. *LOOKS AT BIDEN*

9:29 pm giantepgoynte wrote:

9:29 pm giantepgoynte wrote:

“Sometimes the words don’t come out of your mouth the right way” -Ryan to Biden

OOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH SHIT, SON

9:29 pm gettincrunkman wrote:

My girlfriend just sent the link to me liveblogging to her mom I’m about to get significantly cleanlier.

9:29 pm gettincrunkman wrote:

NORTHBORO MA IS RIGHT NEAR ME Sir Ryan why didn’t you just say hi??

9:28 pm giantepgoynte wrote:

5 point plan:

1 nope

2he stopped counting

3 businesses

4 “Mitt Romney’s a car guy, but let me tell you about the Mittens that I know”

5 Sob story trying to connect with the voters’ heart strings

9:28 pm p-safe wrote:

Ryan: Mitt Romney’s a car guy.

Greaaattt….

9:28 pm gettincrunkman wrote:

5 POINT PLAN DRINK ONCE FOR EVERY POINT

9:27 pm p-safe wrote:

OH SHIT BIDEN DOESN’T BELIEVE RYAN’S “STATISTICS.”

9:27 pm giantepgoynte wrote:

Check out Ryan trying to get the layman’s cred “We come from the same kind of town, Scranton”

9:27 pm gettincrunkman wrote:

Speaking of hostages, everyone should check out that new movie Ben Affleck muhboi is in it

9:26 pm giantepgoynte wrote:

Don’t make Biden angry, you won’t like him (nor will he stop yelling) when he’s angry

9:26 pm p-safe wrote:

Biden is getting feisty all up in this mug.

9:26 pm gettincrunkman wrote:

Nuclear arms race is so fucking scary help please.

DID you just see the Ryan look after Biden talked about that Iran shit?  He just gave him the sassiest look!

 

9:26 pm p-safe wrote:

YouTube facts says that, “As of September 2012, 12.1 people are out of work.”

…0.1 person?

9:25 pm giantepgoynte wrote:

Take a hit/drink every time Biden whips out the 47% quote…

also “I’ve had it up to here” -Biden…he says so many old things

9:24 pm p-safe wrote:

“I mean, I think Romney supports these sanctions, but he changes his mind so much…”

OH SHIT BIDEN JUST ATTACKED ROMNEY.

9:24 pm giantepgoynte wrote:

under 8% unemployment…but they promised that a lil while ago… :(

 

9:23 pm p-safe wrote:

But seriously, no one is focusing on Ryan’s responses; they’re looking to see Biden’s reactions.

9:22 pm giantepgoynte wrote:

Nuclear armdararm??? Nuclear Underarm?

9:22 pm gettincrunkman wrote:

Wait.  Joe Biden can speak like reallyyy well.

9:22 pm giantepgoynte wrote:

Biden…chill out bro…chillllll out. You’re red as a cherry

 

9:22 pm p-safe wrote:

Paul Ryan: *Opens his mouth to speak*

Joe B. under his breath: Oh god…

9:21 pm gettincrunkman wrote:

Sometimes I have a hard time telling who is talking. IS it just me??

9:21 pm giantepgoynte wrote:

FACTS MATTER, MARTHA!!!! SO SHUT UP AND GET OUTTA BIDEN’S WAY

9:21 pm p-safe wrote:

BIDEN: BBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBB. And a bunch of stuff.

Raddatz: WHAT DOES THAT MEAN, A ‘BUNCH OF STUFF?’

9:21 pm giantepgoynte wrote:

Biden is 3 straws away from jumping over the table and strangling Ryan

9:19 pm gettincrunkman wrote:

I promise not to break the seal until Biden breaks the “literally” seal

9:19 pm p-safe wrote:

RADDATZ IS A BADASS.

9:18 pm p-safe wrote:

OH GAWWDDD ANOTHER BIDEN SMILE.

9:18 pm gettincrunkman wrote:

Switched to Landshark… leftover from summer HIYA don’t judge me

9:18 pm p-safe wrote:

@gettingcrunkman #supertwinsies.

The world is one big twitter.

 

9:17 pm gettincrunkman wrote:

@PSafe I wasjust googling pixtures of that smile! #twinsies.

Wait is this not Twiiter?

9:16 pm gettincrunkman wrote:

“Ohmigod, quote me on Wesleying and it’ll make my life”

9:16 pm p-safe wrote:

DUDE. Biden just pulled one of these:

9:15 pm gettincrunkman wrote:

The new drinking game: any time they accuse Joe of being an idiot, drink.

Any time Paul Ryan does a dramatic pause before the climax of statement, drink.

Any time you wonder how hot this moderator might have been in her 20s, drank.

Anytime(oh is it one word now?) I forget what this rule was going to be.

Any time you think that maybe Paul Ryan would be a better president than MittRomney, finish yo drank.

9:13 pm giantepgoynte wrote:

RADDATZ is so aggressive.

#thewomaniwant

9:12 pm p-safe wrote:

Sigh. Oh, Paul.

9:12 pm giantepgoynte wrote:

“No Apologies”…..

never think in black and white…only the sith think in this way…

9:12 pm gettincrunkman wrote:

In all really honesty is it fair to make accusations towards Joe because he’s been in the administration?  Wait. Yes. It is.

9:11 pm giantepgoynte wrote:

shoooooooot dey got biden on defense…

9:11 pm gettincrunkman wrote:

I

9:10 pm giantepgoynte wrote:

RADDATZ FOR PRESIDENT

9:10 pm gettincrunkman wrote:

Where’s our sober frannn?

Biden is laughing sooo much.  Also Biden just wants to say bullshit but didn’t oh $h!t !!!

9:10 pm giantepgoynte wrote:

“everything he said he would do…” idk about that…

9:09 pm p-safe wrote:

P-SAFE IN DA HOUSE.

9:09 pm giantepgoynte wrote:

my bad…malarky…(sp)

9:08 pm giantepgoynte wrote:

It was a great idea to split the screen on this way on the answers or else you couldn’t see Biden saying “BULLSHIT” with every facial expression

9:08 pm gettincrunkman wrote:

It’s funny because one of my friends just wants to drink, one of my friends just wants to watch the debate, and one wants to do neither.  DId Ryan just go after Biden’s son?!!!

9:07 pm giantepgoynte wrote:

In terms of who’s better in looks that’s obvious…bald spots turn me on and that smile is to die for…but Ryan has the body of a short adonis

9:05 pm gettincrunkman wrote:

Two things I notice right away: there aren’t any FUCKING tweets on the screen, and Paul Ryan is looking as hot as ever. lawdy

9:05 pm gettincrunkman wrote:

Two commitments isn’t very many, Mr. Biden…

9:04 pm gettincrunkman wrote:

Why start out so sad?! This is sad! I don’t like this!

9:03 pm gettincrunkman wrote:

WOW they’re sitting so close together!!

9:03 pm gettincrunkman wrote:

coin toss? yeah right. conspiracy. help!

8:58 pm gettincrunkman wrote:

oh no it’s starting soon my fifa game’s in overtime heeellpppp

8:56 pm giantepgoynte wrote:

RADDATZ/ROMNEY 2012

 

8:55 pm giantepgoynte wrote:

Martha “Raddish Lover” Raddatz!

8:54 pm giantepgoynte wrote:

47%: “oh no this is all an artificial high!”

8:53 pm giantepgoynte wrote:

who the fuck is rachel ma..dow (sp)

8:52 pm giantepgoynte wrote:

@paulryan’sbycep

8:51 pm giantepgoynte wrote:

also i’ve been told i can post whatever i want..sweert

8:51 pm giantepgoynte wrote:

wow sweet i was just able to find out how to use this shit…literally so complicated

8:51 pm giantepgoynte wrote:

Rock on-I’m first…the super high guy…yep

cool well i’m watchin it now yay…yayyyy

8:47 pm gettincrunkman wrote:

Not the drinking game we’re using.

So yeah, I’m the drunk one (not yet.) I’m on Dos Equis numero 3, and am on my way if I start mixing (soon, don’t worry.)  Anyone that wants to play along with me, this is the game I’m using, although I do like BroBible’s “Butt chug through a wine enema” if Obama escorts Biden off and says “let’s go, Joe.”

See you on the other side of Sobriety!

5 thoughts on “DRUNK, S0BER, H1GH: Vice Presidential Debate Liveblog

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