Highlights from the WSA Write-Ins

First, a disclaimer. The results from this year’s WSA Winter At-Large Election are not nearly as exciting as those from last year, when, in addition to Giant Joint’s victory, Wesleying’s A-Batte unexpectedly won a spot on the Assembly as a write-in candidate (he took his seat and served honorably before resigning at the close of the semester). Nor is it as scandalous as 2009, when longtime write-in champion Giant Joint ‘420 came within centimeters of garnering 420 votes but was not permitted to serve.

wheres the WSA again???

— Giante P. Goynt (@giantjoint420) April 24, 2012

Nonetheless, you voted early, you voted often, democracy prevailed, and the results are viewable here (you’ll have to log in and click “View Results of This Election”). In order of votes received, the winning WSA representatives-elect are Aobo “Austin” Dong ’15, Christian Hosam ’15, Bruno Machiavelo ’16, Chase Knowles ’16, deer whisperer Samuel Usdan ’15, Glenn Cantave ’15, Angus McLean ’16, and Kara Linn ’15. Congrats—hope you guys weren’t too attached to Sunday nights or anything.

As usual, though, I’m more interested in the vast, colorful array of write-in votes (and not just because I received two of them). In the land before Wes Compliments, WSA write-in votes offered the best, fuzziest glimpse into Wesleyan’s well-wishing subconscious. This year Giant Joint received a disappointing 68 votes, A-Batte scored 20 (excluding the countless variations on his name), and Ron Paul received three. The rest of the write-in votes ranged from President Roth to serial killers to major U.S. cities to Mytheos Holt ’10 to—

Okay, my favorite write-in choices are listed after the jump. 

• giant joint (68 votes)
• anwar batte (20 votes)
• Michael Roth (4 votes)
• huge spliff (3 votes)
• ron paul (3 votes)
• giant jointe (2 votes)
• big blunt (2 votes)
• a giant joint (2 votes)
• big spliff (2 votes)
• hugh j. spliff (1 vote from here onwards)
• a marijuana cigarette of above average size
• anworld war three
• ( ?° ?? ?°) ( ?° ?? ?°) ( ?° ?? ?°)
• disco lipstack
• biant bloint
• that kid, trill
• john wayne gacy jr.
• twitter.com/dnlnss
• yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes
• boston massachussetts
• ted bundy
• you know who i am voting for? so yeah, pat yourself on the back. you’re awesome.
• gint joint
• our stallion of liberty kim jong-un
• martin fucking benjamin
• aynwar randte
• ginormous joint
• mytheos holt
• spliffderforous spliff
• slightly smaller, yet still robust joint

View the full results here.

BZOD: I would also like to point a few out:

• snail (4 votes), the snail (2 votes), and wessquirrels (1 vote), made up the animal contingency
• Jigglypuff, losing quite a bit of ground since the 34 votes it received in its winter 2010 campaign, got a sad, single vote, and Wigglytuff got none.
• chairman meow
• anne hathaway in a catsuit
• coombs, thats a silly hat!
• peter cooper (greenback-labor) – who designed and built the first steam locomotive in the U.S., founded Cooper Union, easily has the craziest beard of any write-in candidate