By now everyone is aware that Friday night’s Senior Cocks ended when a band of biology majors went mad with grief and destroyed the giant brontosaurus statue for reasons that have become quite controversial.
Through a chain of individuals, Wesleying received two quotes reported to be from the museum’s “Incident Report.” They are, to say the least, brilliant.
The two quotes are copied below, and, as always, your comments and absurdities are greatly encouraged.
1. “Wesleyan student removed from the 6th floor for riding the dinosaur.”
2. “Wesleyan student fell down the up escalator. And continued falling as if in a perpetual motion machine.”
Want to yell about this incident in all-caps until you get your aggression out? Click here.
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why isn’t the incident report available in full pdf form? Step your game up, bloggers! Gimme some WesLeaks!
We are working on it. Hopefully soon.
All I can say is that falling down an up escalator is one of the most traumatizing events of my childhood; I totally sympathize with that individual. The confusion, the terror, the shame… ze is scarred for life.
Just wanna call attention to the incredible tagging work on this post.