2015: A Very Wesleying Year In Review


Hello, campus. Wesleying is NOT BuzzFeed, just to let you know. But we do like to do a wrap-up of the calendar year because (1) institutional memory is shit at colleges, (2) synergy, and (3) lists are cool. Btw this post was compiled with the help of the legendary hermes, who is very 2015 and very Internet. Ty.

In this catalog of sorts, we have compiled a summary of the top [arbitrary number] major happenings on this small campus in central Connecticut during the past calendar year. Oh and read these past Years In Review because HISTORY: 2012, 2013, and 2014.

Now a disclaimer: These issues are not ranked with any criteria in mind, they are simply numbered for the sake of numbering. Also, we know that there are many things that occurred on this campus that we may not have gotten to, but we are all of limited perspective and limited time, so if you feel as though we missed something, please leave a comment so that we’re all as informed as possible. Many of these happenings and issues develop through time and are certainly not over because they were listed in a year-in-review post on some random ass website (lol self-deprecation!!). So, if there are any recent developments in anything we did include, leave a comment or email us at staff[at]wesleying[dot]org. I don’t have any more adieus. 

juno1. Laughable Non-Shitstorm Juno

Hey, remember that time people were talking about central CT getting 87 feet of snow or whatever during Juno and then it never happened? lol. There was partying to be had and, oh geez, was it had. I also heard some #radical frosh bought a bong that day and named it Michael Roth.

Also, the administration made staff for Bon App sleep in the DFC just so us liberal arts students could eat.

For further reading:


2. We Are No Longer (Residential) Fratalicious

2015 was the year that three of Wesleyan’s four residential fraternities shut down (though Beta’s original shutdown was in September 2014), and many people have a lot to say about whether or not it was fair to do so, what this does to the party scene, and why the fuck Eclectic is still standing.

DKE filed a lawsuit against Wesleyan, Psi U was taken out of its house after the school year wrapped, and Beta’s been out of its house since the window incident last fall.

For further reading:

Winter at Wesleyan, Jan. 9, 2015. (Photo by Olivia Drake MALS '08)

3. The Molly Incident

We don’t really want to go into this too much since it pretty much dominated all of the Spring 2015 semester. Also, word on the street is Tatiana Schlossberg is still wandering around our campus asking randos for drugs and trying to “blend in” (go shove it, Tatiana).

For further reading:


4. There Is a God and His Name Is Lin-Manuel Miranda

Wesleyan (and Planet Earth) was diagnosed with a little illness called Hamiltonmania, and Lin-Manuel Miranda ’02 slayed as our commencement speaker last spring before he went on to slay ~THE WORLD~.

For further reading:


5. The WSA Rewrites Its Constitution/The Katriarchy Begins

Editor’s note/disclaimer: This is hermes writing this section (hi hello), and WSA prez Kate “Salty” Cullen ’16 has been a friend since, like, orientation week of 2012. Also I was on the WSA for two years and have many feels about it.

Most of you are probably like, “nah, fuck the WSA,” but the Assembly finally completely changed its really annoying and ridiculous constitution this year after the old one had been in place since before we were all born (seriously, it was written in 1993 or something). Anyway, we will (hopefully) be sitting down with Kate and her VP Aidan “I Don’t Have a Confusing and Dumb Nickname for Him” Martinez ’17 early this coming semester to discuss all of the things. It has also been reported by word of mouth that Kate Cullen force-fed Roth this year’s Disorientation Guide like a BADASS!

For further reading:

Wesleyan Newspaper Boycott

6. The Argus Op-Ed

Lordy, much can be said about the Op-Ed Read ‘Round The World (literally). We actually decided to not really comment on it given our awkward position of being a campus publication and also the supposed **Activist Times**, so alas, much of our articles on the subject come from elsewhere (because God knows many other people had a shit ton to say about it).

For further reading:


7. Is This Why Brings Racism on Campus to the Forefront (Again)

Students of Color, in solidarity with student demonstrations around the country, took collective action and presented a list of demands to President Roth. From the organizers:

We, as students of color at Wesleyan University, have been neglected by the administration at this school. We are standing in solidarity with students at Mizzou, Yale, Claremont Mckenna, and all other schools who are fighting back against the daily effects of white supremacy in academia. We are demanding that our administration make justice and equity a priority. With the support of fellow students, faculty, and staff, we are standing up.

The campaign received endorsements by over 100 student groups, academic departments, and other campus organizations.

For further reading:


8. Divestment Groups Unite in Direct Action

Members from Wesleyan Fossil Fuel Divest, Ujaama, and Wesleyan Students for Justice in Palestine united under the new Coalition for Divestment and Transparency and organized a 37-student sit-in in President Roth’s office. The sit-in lasted for more than 10 hours and pressed for divestment of the university endowment from the fossil fuel industry, the prison-industrial complex, and the Israeli occupation of Palestine. Organizers planned the sit-in to mark the 37-year anniversary of a South College sit-in, in which President Roth himself participated, to demand divestment from the South African apartheid. The date conveniently coincided with WesFest and, of course, I brought my PreFrosh.

For further reading:


Honorable Mentions

1. Jeremih at Spring Fling happened, we all learned how to pronounce his name (apparently it’s “Jere-muuuuuhhhhhh”).

2. Adele’s album came out, you fucked your Tinder hookup to it in the Alpha Delt attic.

3. We didn’t make the 2015 NESCAC All-Hair Team, but our beards are top-notch.

4. The dipshits at The Economist ranked us #623, so we continued to hate college rankings.

5. We Started A Revolution With This Method Mag Quiz.

6. Yak about Wesleyan, get an English degree from Trinity.

7. Exley became more hip or whatever (Seats!!!!! Carpeting!!!!) and Pi became a Starbucks knockoff.

8. Banner drops brought awareness to the use and misuse of “townie.”

9. The package center got a huge ass upgrade.

10. Hormones of Wesleyan met Humans of New York.

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One thought on “2015: A Very Wesleying Year In Review

  1. beepo

    wow so much sass in the article, can’t handle it. i thought wesleying was a safe space for me LOL
    thanks for the wrap up!!

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