You know when it’s after Valentine’s Day and you’ve just had like 8 hours of class and you like, didn’t really care about Valentine’s Day but like,, you cared enough to maybe watch something about it and now you’re on Netflix and scrolling past all those thumbnails with two people smiling at each other and biting their lip and just wish there was a way to know which of those thumbnails was worth your sweet sweet time?? You’re in luck! I watched 8 Netflix Original rom coms and ranked them so you don’t have to. So, get under those covers, put on the face mask you got last semester from RiteAid, and treat yourself to one of these eight amazingly mediocre Valentine’s Day themed movies <3
- The Princess Switch
Time commitment: 102 minutes
Vanessa Hudgens owns a bakery and has a friend who has a daughter, who Vanessa Hudgens gets along with well. Together, they all go to a bake-off in some fictionalized European country, call it Genovia, where she meets Princess Vanessa Hudgens, who looks exactly like her and is engaged to a prince she’s not crazy about. Switch! They pretend to be each other and fall in love with their respective friend/prince. 8th because it was physically difficult to watch. But you should watch it!
Time commitment: 94 minutes
Five minutes into this movie the main character jets off to Spain cus she’s tired of the crowded subways and her boring PR job. There, she meets a hot DJ and follows him to Ibiza, but most of the movie is her and her friends doing wild stuff like ~drugs~ and being ~crazy~. This one is 7th cus it felt too long.
- When We First Met
Time commitment: 97 minutes
Watched this one on a plane once and Adam Devine is in love with his best friend, Girl With Really Blue Eyes, who is engaged to someone else. Then Adam finds out a photo booth is a time machine and keeps shooting his shot til he gets it right. SPOILER ALERT (but not that much of a spoiler if you can pick up on foreshadowing) Girl With Blue Eyes has a pretty best friend, and you know what happens after that. 6th cus it was very predictable.
- Nappily ever After
Time commitment: 98 minutes
A black woman has it ALL. Fancy clothes, fancy boyfriend, fancy hair… but when her fiancé doesn’t propose, she gets DRUNK! And cuts off all her hair and finds herself, shown by her choice to fall in love with a man who isn’t rich and has a daughter.
- Sierra Burgess is a Loser
Time commitment: 105 minutes
Barb from Stranger Things finds herself in a pickle when she starts catfishing Peter Kavinsky from To All the Boys I’ve Loved Before as the popular girl in school. He falls for her over text cus she’s ~different~ but it gets ethically iffy when she blindfolds him and kisses him, but he thinks it’s the popular girl?? Wild stuff goes down after that, but you already know it ends happily for Barb, whose name is Sierra Burgess in this movie.
- The Kissing Booth
Time Commitment: 110 minutes
[editor’s note from sdz and meli: this movie is absolute trash, for the sake of posterity please do not watch this movie]
A girl has a crush on her best friend’s brother but rule #16 of their friendship is don’t do that. She makes a kissing booth to fundraise for the school and brings the brother in as the celebrity kisser so that everyone buys the kisses. Then they kiss and start ~secretly~ dating and trouble (but also sweet sweet lovin) ensues!!
- To All the Boys I’ve Loved Before
Time commitment: 99 minutes
A girl writes letters to all the boys she’s ever had a crush on and her rat sister sends out all the letters. This is a problem cus one of the boys is her other sister’s ex boyfriend and another is a Super Cute ™ Peter Kavinsky. To get the first boy off her case, she starts fake dating super cute boy and we’re all gonna act surprised when they fall in love. This one’s #2 cus, as mentioned, lead boy is Super Cute™.
- Big Mouth Valentine’s Day Special
Time commitment: 44 minutes
Everything you already love about Big Mouth but Valentimes-y. Not technically a rom com but worth your attention and praise. And who doesn’t want to hear John Mulaney’s voice on Valentine’s day?? I may be biased. Notable line: “You had me at tender nipples.”