Category Archives: Featured

Spring Break Hours: Sustenance & More!

so ~springy~ amirite??? (photo courtesy of Bowen He ’21)

Despite what the layers of ice and snow blanketing the campus may signal, it is indeed spring break! Some of you may be jetting (or ride-begging) off into warmer climes, but for those staying in this wintry wasteland on campus, you’ll need sustenance (even if you’re planning on hibernating through long stretches of break).

Lucky for you, we’ve outlined below what’s going to be open and what’s going to be closed and at what times the open things will be open. Just look for the place you want to eat at and then check the hours.  Hint: if the place is not Weshop it probably won’t be open.  If you feel like you need to see this information in chart form you can do so on the websites of each place here: (Bon AppetitWesWings & Red and BlackLibraries).

A Seat for Everyone

You walk into Usdan, Canada goose gently gliding in the wind behind you. You weave through the bustling gaggle of students who are ¾ hangry, 1/4 inebriated. You chuckle at your own cleverness in coming up with that piece of fraction humor. You exclaim to your friend, the one with brown hair wearing Bean Boots, “damn, why is it always so crowded in here”. She’s like, “idk, ugh.” You decide to peruse Soggy We$ Memes to fill the time it takes waiting on the Usdan staircase, a unique structure that gives you an elevated perspective of people’s scalps staring down at the tinder profiles of that kid from Econ.  

You come across a meme, a meme you’re sure you’ll understand, a template you’ve seen a million times. You know the one. That guy looking at a butterfly. And he’s like “Is this ___?” Classic. But then you look a little closer. The guy is labeled as “Wesleyan’s inconsiderate student body”. And that’s not all. The butterfly was labeled “Usdan Lunch rush”. No way. You are IN THAT RN!!! And here’s the kicker, the caption at the bottom, which is a little hard to read since you are trying to walk up the Usdan steps at the same time, reads “Is this a good place to hold an hour-long conversation with my friends even though there are clearly people without seats who actually intend to eat, not network.”

An Avian Infestation: Canada Goose at Wesleyan

Image courtesy of our friends at wesleyangeese

It’s winter at Wesleyan. The days are short, you’re not allowed to open the windows in your dorm, and you’re not sure if the cloud coming from your classmate’s mouth is their frozen breath or just their Juul. But winter at a liberal arts college also conjures up a true evil of this world: flocks of Canada Geese.

For those of you who aren’t aware, Canada Goose jackets are the winter coat of choice for Wesleyan students who get monthly allowances and who go to the Bahamas for Christmas. A Canada Goose parka retails for $950, while a longer length coat will set you back $1,050. The most expensive one I found while doing research for this piece was a “quilted blazer” made in collaboration with the brand Henry Poole that was going for $1,695 (it includes straps so you can carry it like a backpack???)

How could something so expensive be so ugly?????

Obviously the prices are atrocious, but what really gets me about all these Canada Gooses (Geese? Gooses? Who knows) is that YOU DON’T NEED ONE FOR CONNECTICUT.

We’re Selling Stickers! So That We May Perpetuate Our Existence!

check out these ~sexy~ new sticker designs from our very own sdz (and our classic logo ones are back too)

Hey campus, how’s it going? Grinding tension of the academic experience just starting to build up? Same. Well, we have stickers to solve your problems. You might wonder, what purpose does a blog without a brand (okay, let’s be real, we definitely have a brand, and it is silly tweets and bad jokes) have for merch?

Well, first of all: we think these stickers are really, really cool and we like them a lot. That should be reason enough. But, unfortunately, it’s not.

We need money.

I know what you’re thinking. “Wesleying, I thought you were on our side in the struggle against the pressures of capitalism?” We are, but existing on the internet isn’t free. Our servers cost $25/month (up from $5 a month) and we have domain name expenses.

Wesleying has existed for 13 years (l’chayim!) as the only student publication at Wesleyan that has not received a single dime from the SBC. We are not a registered student group and don’t intend to become one. We think it insulates us quite uniquely from a lot of institutional pressures, so we can say whatever the fuck we want, pretty much (without being assholes).

We’ve been a platform for student voices and #snarky #commentary and breaking news and party locations and orgasm stories and Seniors talking about their theses and frosh learning about Wes. More generally, we have been a vehicle for idea transmission. People, for some reason or another, have viewed the site over 6 million times and submitted thousands of events to the site in the past 13 years.

But, our bank account is running low. #Classic #College #Student

So, we’re selling stickers! They’re very cool stickers! You should buy them!

There’s 3 sticker designs (pictured above), and we’re selling them for $3-5 each, or $10 for all 3! What a deal! You get to show off your blog/school/debaucherous spirit, and we get to stay online and posting about all things Wes! Or, if you’re just feeling generous, you can venmo us a donation @wesleying! Or use campus mail to send quarters (or dollar bills, or checks) to WesBox #90183! We’ll take anything we can get!

But WHERE CAN I GET THESE STICKERS?!?!?!?!? We’ll be posting on Twitter and Instagram when/where we are selling stickers! We’re a very personable blog, and we want to meet you, our dear readers/supporters! If you can’t seem to catch us around campus, you can DM us on any of our social media accounts, or shoot us an email at staff[at]wesleying[dot]org!

Thanks for supporting independent blogging here at Wesleying! #SBCFreeSince2006

Welcome Class of 2023: ED2 Edition!

This past Wednesday, Wesleyan University welcomed a new batch of students via Early Decision 2! Firstly, I’d like to speak directly to our freshly hatched 2023’ers and welcome you to our community. You have just committed to ~4 years of magical experiences that will leave you both intellectually enlightened and slightly bloated.

As someone who was accepted in ED2, I understand the excitement of receiving this acceptance at the peak of your senioritis. I wish you the best of luck now that you are legally bound to this institution and its host town, the booming metropolis of Middletown, Connecticut.

Another perk of your acceptance is that you are free to explore the most creative and news-worthy student blog, Wesleying. Here you can learn about all the hot topics of discussion that provide the only entertainment in our mundane undergraduate lives. From campus events to random memes to social commentary on campus life, Wesleying has it all. *wink*

We feel very lucky that your first-choice school rejected you.

 

8 Netflix Rom-Coms to Watch post-V-Day

You know when it’s after Valentine’s Day and you’ve just had like 8 hours of class and you like, didn’t really care about Valentine’s Day but like,, you cared enough to maybe watch something about it and now you’re on Netflix and scrolling past all those thumbnails with two people smiling at each other and biting their lip and just wish there was a way to know which of those thumbnails was worth your sweet sweet time?? You’re in luck! I watched 8 Netflix Original rom coms and ranked them so you don’t have to. So, get under those covers, put on the face mask you got last semester from RiteAid, and treat yourself to one of these eight amazingly mediocre Valentine’s Day themed movies <3

Hot for Teacher: The Best On-Campus Date Spots for You and Your Secret Professor Lover

Editor’s Note: While it can be fun to joke about professor crushes, we want to emphasize that this post represents fictional situations, and that we do not promote such relationships in real life. We don’t want to make light of the actual harmful power dynamics that can arise from these prohibited relationships. Furthermore, research and experiences of Wesleyan professors have shown that the objectification of female and non-white professors is a barrier to them advancing in their fields, particularly when it comes to course evaluations.

Wesleying extends our support and our platform to any survivor of sexual misconduct who wishes to share their story. We condemn all forms of sexual misconduct including professor-student relationships and discriminatory employment practices based on gender. If you believe that you or someone else has been the recipient of such advances, you can always reach out to SACE Director Johanna DeBari or SACE Intern Rachele Merliss ‘19 to talk, and you can find a complete list of on- and off-campus resources here.

this is just some german mathematician we found on the internet

We all know how it starts: First they asked the class to call them by their first name, but soon enough you’re giving each other the eyes in Tishler and making out in Music Studios practice rooms. What started out as a spark has turned into an illicit romance between you and a man or woman a decade or four older than you. What now?

Fear not! If you’re an aspiring Emmanuel Macron struggling on how and where to spend extra-curricular time with your Brigette, we’ve got you covered. The criteria:

Intimacy: How romantic is it?
Privacy: How secluded is it?
Convenience: How accessible is it?
Covertness: How easy would it be to explain to a nosy Michael Roth?

Let’s get that extra credit!

2019 Honorary Degree Recipients Announced: Hartman ’84, Carby, & Sanders ’69

In an email this morning, President Roth ’76 announced this year’s Commencement Speaker will be Saidiya Hartman ’84 (above). Reverend Edwin C. Sanders II ’69 (left) and Former Wesleyan Professor Hazel V. Carby (right) will also receive honorary degrees at the University’s 187th Commencement.

This seems to be the first time in a while that Roth has actually read the room when selecting honorees for Commencement. It’s certainly gratifying to see a Black woman being honored for her achievements on the 50th anniversary of the Vanguard Class of ’96 and the founding of the African American studies program (which has finally been received department status this year).

Certainly, this year’s honorees are a welcome variation from last year’s Commencement Speaker controversy. As many of you recall, Daniel Handler ’92, who has a history of racist and sexist harassment, was chosen as the 2018 Commencement Speaker, while Dr. Anita Hillknown for advocating against those very abuses, was relegated to a lesser position of honorary degree recipient. Handler later withdrew as Commencement Speaker following a flurry of student and alumni demands to #CancelHandler18. Notably, President Roth and the administration did nothing in response to concerns and complaints from survivors, students and alumni of color, and other members of the Wesleyan community. Dr. Hill graciously agreed to give the Commencement address in Handler’s stead.

Hopefully this year’s Honorary Degree recipients can become emblematic of the excellence that Wesleyan chooses to honor at future Commencement Ceremonies, rather than continuing a pattern of choosing powerful (and often problematic) white men who don’t represent the community or values that Wesleyan claims to strive toward.

If you have thoughts or feelings about this year’s selection of honorees, we welcome write-ins and guest posts! Just shoot us an email at staff[at]wesleying[dot]edu.

The full text of Roth’s email can be read below: