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Wesleyan Student Run Cafe Needs You!

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From Alex Bernson ‘11:

The Wesleyan Student Cafe is going be opening be open for your late night study-fuel needs starting in late September. Here’s how you can help:

  1. Help us come up with aname! There will be a poll once school starts, so help us brainstorm options now. Some ideas we’ve come up with: “The Red Bird”, “Red Eye Cafe”, “Cardinal’s Habit” and “Cardinal’s Cup”.
  2. Work for us! If you are work-study, apply at: http://www.wesleyan.edu/finaid/employment/ay_jobs/WSA/12105.html
  3. Volunteer on the cafe committee. You’ll get to help with advertising, community events and creating a community space . Email Alex Bernson ‘11 (abernson(at)wesleyan(dot)com) if you’re interested.

Send Questions or comments to Alex Bernson ‘11 abernson(at)wesleyan(dot)com or the WSA wsa(at)wesleyan(dot)com.

Actors Needed for Freshman Orientation

Actors are needed for the Unspeakable Acts and new alcohol performances during freshman orientation.  Early arrival housing and meals can be arranged and it’s A LOT of fun!  Please respond to aknauerhase(at)wesleyan(dot)edu for more details.

Wesleyan Spirits’ Spring Jam: Tonight at 9!

The Spirit ‘81 writes:

The Spirits’ Spring Jam! Come see it. Big things. New musics. A life-changing experience. A waste of your time. All wrapped into one hour of songs you love and other songs too. A revelation; a revaluation! A cappella–without boundaries!

Plus, it’s your last chance to see senior Phi Beta Kappa members Daniel Charness ‘10, Justin Bours ‘10, and Hansel Tan ‘10 do the only thing they are good at!

Date: May 7th
Time: 9pm
Place: Memorial Chapel
Price: Fo FREE

What does Colbert have in common with Stewart?

James Dixon, Talent Agent – ON CAMPUS!

Persephone Hall (love her) of the CRC is gonna help make all of your cable late night news parody hosting dreams come true:

Come hear how Mr. Dixon has used his intuition, assertiveness and creativity to launch the careers of these (and other) famous comedians!

Come and bring a friend!

Date: April 21
Time: 5:00 PM – 6:30 PM
Place: Albritton 304

Wesleyan ESL Interest Meetings

WesESL is looking for new tutors! WesESL developed out of the Justice for Janitors movement in 2001 and currently offers one-on-one English lessons for members of the Wesleyan custodial staff and of the greater Middletown community. Come check out one the meetings this week if you’re interested in becoming a tutor next Fall!

Meeting times are:

  • TUESDAY, April 13 9:00pm in Usdan 110
  • THURSDAY, April 15 at 4:15 in PAC 104

Onion: “New College Graduates To Be Cryogenically Frozen Until Job Market Improves”

Sometimes The Onion gets it so right it hurts. Hard. And by “sometimes” I clearly mean “most of the time.” Here’s a bold solution to recession-related graduation woes that makes way more sense than it probably ever should:

In a bold new measure intended to address unemployment among young professionals, lawmakers from across the political spectrum agreed on legislation Tuesday to subsidize the cryogenic freezing of recent college graduates until the job market recovers. . . .

“Were we to freeze these graduates at the height of vigor and ambition, however, there’s a chance we could revive them during a more prosperous time,” Hutchinson continued. “When the economy finally bounces back—10, 20, even 30 years from now—we’ll have an entire generation thawed out and ready to contribute.”

Read More »

Female model sought for painting thesis

Anna Mendes ‘10 is looking for a female model to pose for several hours a week during the first week of Spring Break for her Painting Thesis:

The poses will be seated and nude. While you are being painted, you can listen to music or books on tape to pass the time.

If you are interested please call 917 373 5274 or email annabellemendes(at)gmail.com.

Anna would like to begin as soon as possible, so let her know ASAP!

Staying at Wes Over Break?

From Becca Loomis ‘10:

Are you going to be on campus the first week of Spring Break? Want to make $7? Sign up to participate in a senior thesis examining eye movements and reading! The study is being run in the Eye Movement and Reading Laboratory in the Psychology Department. The experiment takes 20-40 minutes and involves reading sentences on a computer screen. You must be a Wesleyan student and a native English speaker to participate. Email rloomis@wes or eyelab@wes for information or to sign up!

Breakthrough Collaborative Info Session

From Alex Hartley ‘10:

This summer, do something real. Teach Breakthroughs.

Breakthrough Collaborative’s 35 sites across the country are looking for undergraduates to teach ambitious underserved middle schoolers.

Teaching with Breakthrough is the premier pre-professional teaching experience anywhere, and the most challenging internship of any kind available to undergraduates.

As a teacher, you will plan and teach your own classes under the guidance of professional educators. You’ll work long hours, push yourself like you never have before and make a genuine difference in the lives of tomorrow’s urban leaders.

Applications available at http://www.teachbreakthroughs.org. All undergraduates are eligible to apply.

Come to an info session to learn more and hear about alumni experiences!

Contact Alex Hartley, Wesleyan’s campus recruiter, with questions at ahartley(at)wes

Date: Wednesday Feb. 3
Time: 5:30 PM – 6:30 PM
Place: PAC 002

Apply for a Writing Mentor!

Feeling stressed? Need writing assistance? Apply for a writing mentor!

  • Provides one-on-one, regular tutoring services
  • Provides help whenever you are writing a paper
  • For more information check out the mentor website.
  • Fill out our online application by Tuesday, February 2nd

Super Mario musical seeks crew members

piranha plantAnthony Martello ‘10 is looking for some key crew members to help manage his senior thesis musical about Super Mario this spring. That’s right – a live-action musical about Super Mario. Are you gonna miss your chance to tell people you helped produce a musical about Super Mario in college?

Only at Wesleyan. Details:

It has bits of all of the classic tunes that everyone loves!

I need a stage manager, an assistant stage manager, and a few set designers. The stage managers keep track of the actors, keep notes during rehearsals, run tech week, call cues during the play, and organize & generally coordinate all technical aspects of the play including the designers. The set designers help plan and build the set.

Auditions will be held near the beginning of the semester, and the musical will go on the weekend of April 2 – April 4 at the ‘92 Theater with the help of Second Stage.

Anyone who is interested in any of these positions or helping out with any aspect of the musical should email me as soon as possible at amartello@wes. Thanks so much for all of the help!

Imagine this, with actual instruments and higher production values:

OCS is Hiring: Program Coordinator

FLanguage Bankrom Nadeem Modan ‘10:

The Office of Community Service is hiring a Program Coordinator! Please help spread the word.

The Program Coordinator will manage the Language Bank, which can be found at www.wesleyan.edu/ocs/lbinfo.html, and they will also serve as an Office Assistant at the OCS. Schedule is flexible. Work-study required.

For more information and for an application, please contact Nadeem at nmodan_at_wes. The application deadline is Saturday, December 12th at 4pm.

Attention Juniors!

Junior year is almost halfway over… can you believe it? To make your life easier, we’re bringing together all the resources you need to succeed. Thursday night at 7pm, stop by the Hi-Rise Lounge for dessert from a local bakery and to talk to:

- The Peer Advisors, who will be answering questions about time management and studying for finals
- The CRC, who will be giving an overview of when to start thinking about GREs, LSATs, MCATs, grad schools, and internships
- The Writing Workshop Ford fellows, who will explain how to start planning for a senior thesis or essay
- Dean Garrett, who will talk about GenEds, graduation credits, oversubscription and planning for senior year.

Date: Thursday, Dec. 10
Time: 7pm
Place: High Rise Lounge

Soundboard Operator Needed!

The Yalta Conference is still looking for someone to run the sound board! You could be that person!

Basically, it’s a show about the greatest political conference of the 20th century…fraught with lies, deception, sex, and comedy.

The Yalta Conference goes up in the ‘92 theater on
Thursday 12/10 @ 8pm
Friday 12/11 @ 8pm
Saturday 12/12 @ 1pm and 8pm.

Contact Abaye Steinmetz-Silber at asteinmetzsi(at)wesleyan(dot)edu for more info!

Photographer Seeks Models for Bold Project

An anonymExample. ous junior writes:

MODELS NEEDED!

I need models who are willing to be photographed while masturbating. These will not, in any way, be pornographic or fetish-like photographs–They are photographs for a Photo I course. There is no preference in gender, size, or anything else; in fact, a diverse selection of bodies would be preferred. Photographs will be taken in the comfort of your own living space; or wherever you do the deed. The images will focus on, but not be limited to, the facial expressions one makes while masturbating. No images will be shown without the approval of the model. If interested, please email LloydSchumner@gmail.com a.s.a.p. with your name and phone number, and anything else you feel would be relevant information. I will call and go over details specifically.

If you are interested but worried about confidentiality, please contact me anyway and we can talk more.

thank you,

-Lloyd
[Anonymous (not Lloyd) '11]