As much as it pains me to do a rankings post, it’s the summer and well, rankings are rankings. Forbes has released its own top Colleges and Universities list. Williams, Princeton, and Amherst make up the top three, and Wesleyan falls in line at #15, right between Haverford and Whitman College. Forbes describes the idea behind its rankings as:
To our way of thinking, a good college is one that meets student needs. While other college rankings are based in large part on school reputation as evaluated by college administrators, we focus on factors that directly concern incoming students: Will my courses be interesting? Is it likely I will graduate in four years? Will I incur a ton of debt getting my degree? And once I get out of school, will I get a good job?
As always, the rankings seem fairly controversial (Cornell is at #70, John Hopkins is at #88, and NYU is all the way down at #173). To see the full list, click here; the full methodology is here.
Enjoy another way to re-live that college search process and feel good about your decision (or if it wasn’t your decision – feel good that Brown was 30 spots behind at #45). Or, you know, just ignore it all (Forbes is mainstream after all). Enjoy your last month of summer (sorry alums!).
“Harvard is proud to honor the tremendous merits of Adderall, without which many of you would not be sitting here today,” Faust said in her opening address to the nearly 1,900 unblinking and intensely focused students receiving their diplomas. “I don’t think I’m exaggerating matters when I say that Adderall has been an inspiration to us all.”
The psychologically addictive drug then received resounding applause from the assembled graduates, with many jumping to their feet, clapping in near unison for 25 straight minutes, temporarily forgetting where they were, and then grinding their teeth in celebration of the well-deserved honor.
In other college commencement news, NBC’s Ann Curry takes the commencement speech flub of the year award by a landslide. The news anchor spoke this past weekend at Wheaton College in Massachusetts and wisely lauded the accomplishments of its graduates, including evangelist Billy Graham, 9/11 hero Todd Beamer, and director Wes Craven—all of whom attended the other Wheaton College. You know—in Illinois. At least Obama was maybe probably jokingwhen he called us “Wellesleyan” in ‘08.
Still, Curry was classy enough to apologize in full:
So it is with a heavy heart that I ask you to forgive me for mistakenly naming graduates of the other Wheaton College in my address. . . .
I am mortified by my mistake, and can only hope the purity of my motive, to find a way to connect with the graduates and to encourage them to a life of service, will allow you to forgive me.
I’m thinking it’s an all-too-familiar scenario for students and graduates of the twenty Wesleyan variations scattered around the country—I can only imagine the murderous glare you’d get if you mention MGMT to an Ohio Wesleyan alum. So if you’re out there, Mayor John Hickenlooper ‘74: thanks for not mentioning Illinois Wesleyan alums Adlai Stevenson and Alfred O. Coffin (the “first African American man to receive a Ph.D in Zoology”—thanks, Wikipedia!) in your speech last week. We got your back.
Hey 2010 (and anyone else joining in on the Senior Week Festivities):
I’ve been volunteering for The International Rescue Committee in New York City and would like to make a request on their behalf: If you are leaving any of the following items here in Middletown when you leave campus, the IRC would really appreciate if you would donate them!
These items will go directly to refugee families starting new lives in New York City, who often arrive with little more than the clothes on their backs. Any help in providing these necessities goes a long way towards giving them a better chance at forming stable and successful lives here in the U.S.
THEY NEED:
- laptop computers (ideally with functioning operating system … )
- plates, cutlery, pots and pans (in good condition)
- fans
- electric kettles
- notebooks, pencils, pens, pencil sharpeners
- throw pillows (optional)
- posters/frames (optional)
- blankets
- area rugs
- umbrellas
- curtains
If you have any of these items and would consider donating them to the International Rescue Committee I would be happy to pick them up for you. Additionally, anyone willing to donate a working laptop computer gets a beer of their choosing!
Please contact me for pick ups: jstein02@wesleyan.edu or 516-647-4513 (day or night).
Thank you and party hard.
Posted by Beckyon May 21, 2010 at 11:53 AM|Comments Off
What do I do if my college graduate cries? What do I do if he screams?
College graduates are setting foot in the real world for the very first time. Imagine how daunting that must be! They have so many daily needs, and yet they lack even the most basic tools required to survive in the world. They are completely helpless. Crying and screaming are ways for college graduates to communicate their frustrations, so that you can solve their problems for them. Again, you can usually find out what’s wrong by consulting a simple checklist:
Does your college graduate have enough cigarettes? Yes / No
Did you remember to fill her wallet with cash? Yes / No
Does she have Internet access? Yes / No
Has she had her daily nap? Yes / No
Does she have her Moleskine and/or sketch pad? Yes / No
Does she have her bottle? Yes / No
Sounds about right. I guess all that’s missing is how to gently cure your college graduate’s mental dependence on a goddamn falafel cart and teach hir to recognize authority figures slightly more threatening than P-Safe’s Dave Meyer. Good luck, kids. I’ll be over here, clinging to the Olin steps railing.
Wes may have Spring Fling, but Oregon’s intensely rigorous (and famously rankings-shy) Reed College has Renn Fayre. Check it:
Renn Fayre is often called the metaphorical explosion of the student body after a year of intense pressure. Traditions and events include bizarre art installations, bug-eating contests, the alumni Meat Smoke, a naked Slip ‘n Slide, occasional motorized couches, fireworks, naked people painting themselves blue (a tribute to the ancient Picts), a beer garden, the Glo Opera (performed at night by actors covered in EL wire and glowsticks), lube wrestling, full-contact human chess, parachuters, castle-storming and bike-jousting by members of C.H.V.N.K. 666, a fire-dancing performance by the Weapons of Mass Distraction (the college’s own Fire Troupe), a softball tournament of academic department teams, a feast contributed to by student-donated leftover board points, a cooking contest, and a general sense of mayhem.
You get all that, Social Committee?
The school placards its borders during the notoriously drug- and alcohol-drenched festival, denying the general public entry. It’s probably no surprise, then, that the authorities—in this case, U.S. Attorney Dwight Holton—would crack down eventually. But a recent meting between Holton and Reed president Colin Diver prompted a different question entirely—can colleges be prosecuted as Crack Houses?—and left Diver reeling from the threat of jail time under a federal statute intended to harden penalties on crack house proprietors. Never before has the statute been used on a college campus.
Kinda makes you wonder at the implications of administrative drug-related cheek-turning, yeah?
Our friends at Brown’s Blog Daily Herald designed this handy matrix guide to schools’ spring concerts. Notice who comes out on top, huh? Click to enlarge:
Do you want to do something meaningful this summer? Get out of the country? Volunteer or intern withVolunteer Kilimanjaro.
Placements include education, agriculture, and program development. Teach English, learn about sustenance farming from a local farmers, teach computer literacy to teachers, develop extracurricular activities for school children, and form lasting relationships with local community members in Tanzania.
A local organization in Tarakea, Tanzania at the foot of Mt. Kilimanjaro. Two week to three month placements. No previous experience necessary. Affordable, with lower rates for pairs and groups and discounts on Kili treks and safaris. You can stay with a host family or in Kilimanjaro cabins and eat and cook typical Tanzanian food. Learn about international development outside of the classroom!
Currently accepting applications for summer volunteers and interns. Contact volunteerkilimanjaro(at)gmail(dot)com or vcadilla@wes for more information.
Posted by Heatheron April 5, 2010 at 12:27 PM|Comments Off
Larry Talley was a Navy officer for 20 years, and was stationed in Panama for five of them. While in Central America, he routinely worked in conjunction with the Drug Enforcement Agency (DEA) to counter the efforts of drug cartel’s throughout Latin America. Larry was personally involved with many raids on cartel operations and drug production facilities, and witnessed firsthand the devastating violence and destruction caused by the illegal drug market. Thousands of cartel-related murders are taking place across the region annually, contributing to ecological destruction, mass migration, and cultural degradation. It is estimated that up to 70% of all funding for the drug cartels can be linked to marijuana sales within the United States alone. Larry will testify to these horrible crimes, and make the case for what he believes will fix drug related violence, both inside the U.S. and around the globe: the full legalization and regulation of all drugs.
Join Students for Sensible Drug Policy and Ajua Campos for a groundbreaking dialogue about U.S. drug policy, and it’s effect on the rest of the Americas. If we hope to address the cycles of violence throughout the Americas, we cannot do so without talking about ending the “War on Drugs.”
Please join us! Free food will be provided, all are welcome to attend! Check out the facebook event here.
Everyone’s favorite vinyl (and CD, and DVD bootleg) vendor brings his stash back to Usdan on Monday:
Spring is here! So is the vinyl for one last time this semester. As always, I have plenty of new stuff for y’all to look at. And I’m taking requests, so if you want a particular slab o’ wax or something on CD, let me know and I’ll do my best to accommodate. I’ll be at Usdan by the staircase from noon to 5 PM. Come on down!
What: Vinyl/CD Sale
Place: Usdan
Date: Monday, April 5
Time: Noon – 5 PM
Email requests to mt(at)wnhu(dot)net.
Posted by Zachon April 2, 2010 at 4:01 PM|Comments Off
It seems thatRep.Rosa DeLauro (D-CT), who represents the 3rd congressional district of Connecticut (which includes New Haven and the part of Middlesex County containing our own Middletown), is a fucking hipster.
Sometimes The Onion gets it so right it hurts. Hard. And by “sometimes” I clearly mean “most of the time.” Here’s a bold solution to recession-related graduation woes that makes way more sense than it probably ever should:
In a bold new measure intended to address unemployment among young professionals, lawmakers from across the political spectrum agreed on legislation Tuesday to subsidize the cryogenic freezing of recent college graduates until the job market recovers. . . .
“Were we to freeze these graduates at the height of vigor and ambition, however, there’s a chance we could revive them during a more prosperous time,” Hutchinson continued. “When the economy finally bounces back—10, 20, even 30 years from now—we’ll have an entire generation thawed out and ready to contribute.”
Somewhat in keeping with the flood of parodies that have inundated Wesleying over the past few days, here’s one in honor of Dr. Seuss’s bday (which is today). It gets really good around 2:00.
Ha Ha...Jordan Goldman Making Mischief: Is williams a "new" ivy? Wes only 8th Most Political College?http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2010/08/24/the-new-ivies-10-schools-_n_692223.html#s128862
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2010/08/28/the-most-political-colleg_n_697826.html#s129203
… )
