Category Archives: Random

Quiet Side Story: An American Musical

to the tune of Avril Lavigne’s Sk8er Boy

 

He was a boy
she was a girl
can I make it any more heteronormative?
He’s into film,
she plays croquet
What more can I say?
He wescams her
She does as well,
They come to Usdan dressed in pastel
They took The Ride
But he had lied,
That he was cool sitting on Loud side

He was a film house boy
She only drank la croix,
He really hated Loud Side Yooz
She was like “what the hell?”
Was he feeling unwell?
She thought that Quiet side was a snooze

Five days from now
She sits on Quiet side
Wishing that she hadn’t tried to hide
Because she realized
That she really prized
Seeing the happiness in his eyes
When she would say
Let’s go and play
A little of my favorite sport, croquet
And in return
I’ll have to learn
To have dinner without athletes in the way

He was a film house boy
She only drank la croix
He really hated loud side yooz
But with some patience and
A little raisin bran
Quiet was no longer a snooze

She took a chance
She asked him to dance
He thought it was a real romance
She never knew
what Usdan could do
To change everything that you thought you knew
She would decide
that loud to quiet side
Was not so big of a divide
Now they’re just friends
But it’s ok,
Cuz they sit on quiet side every day
Laughing about
Loud side throughout
Knowing that later they’d play croque

He was a film house boy
She only drank la croix
He had stopped hating loud side yooz
It didn’t matter now
They worked it out somehow
Now they had nothing left to lose

ASK WESLEYING: Nude in the NESCAC

Welcome to the seventh installment of Ask Wesleying, an advice column about any and all things Wes! Have a question about life at Wes? Submit it to get it answered in Ask Wesleying! You can find all of the Ask Wesleying columns here.

It’s been a loooooong hiatus, what with thesis, winter break, thesis, spring break, more thesis (you get the point). But fear not, I haven’t forgotten about all you questioning souls haunting campus, awaiting answers to put your spirits to rest.

This week’s question is about one of those things that gets mentioned on your admissions tour and then never arises again, nudity:

Dear Wesleying,

I’ve been trying to find information about how to apply as a nude model for art classes next semester, but have emerged unsuccessful. Do you have any info about who to contact, any requirements, etc? Also, any tips on how to locate the nude scene at Wes (if there is one?) would be greatly appreciated!

Sincerely,

Nude in the NESCAC

You can read the answer to this week’s question below the jump!

We’re Selling Stickers! So That We May Perpetuate Our Existence!

check out these ~sexy~ new sticker designs from our very own sdz (and our classic logo ones are back too)

Hey campus, how’s it going? Grinding tension of the academic experience just starting to build up? Same. Well, we have stickers to solve your problems. You might wonder, what purpose does a blog without a brand (okay, let’s be real, we definitely have a brand, and it is silly tweets and bad jokes) have for merch?

Well, first of all: we think these stickers are really, really cool and we like them a lot. That should be reason enough. But, unfortunately, it’s not.

We need money.

I know what you’re thinking. “Wesleying, I thought you were on our side in the struggle against the pressures of capitalism?” We are, but existing on the internet isn’t free. Our servers cost $25/month (up from $5 a month) and we have domain name expenses.

Wesleying has existed for 13 years (l’chayim!) as the only student publication at Wesleyan that has not received a single dime from the SBC. We are not a registered student group and don’t intend to become one. We think it insulates us quite uniquely from a lot of institutional pressures, so we can say whatever the fuck we want, pretty much (without being assholes).

We’ve been a platform for student voices and #snarky #commentary and breaking news and party locations and orgasm stories and Seniors talking about their theses and frosh learning about Wes. More generally, we have been a vehicle for idea transmission. People, for some reason or another, have viewed the site over 6 million times and submitted thousands of events to the site in the past 13 years.

But, our bank account is running low. #Classic #College #Student

So, we’re selling stickers! They’re very cool stickers! You should buy them!

There’s 3 sticker designs (pictured above), and we’re selling them for $3-5 each, or $10 for all 3! What a deal! You get to show off your blog/school/debaucherous spirit, and we get to stay online and posting about all things Wes! Or, if you’re just feeling generous, you can venmo us a donation @wesleying! Or use campus mail to send quarters (or dollar bills, or checks) to WesBox #90183! We’ll take anything we can get!

But WHERE CAN I GET THESE STICKERS?!?!?!?!? We’ll be posting on Twitter and Instagram when/where we are selling stickers! We’re a very personable blog, and we want to meet you, our dear readers/supporters! If you can’t seem to catch us around campus, you can DM us on any of our social media accounts, or shoot us an email at staff[at]wesleying[dot]org!

Thanks for supporting independent blogging here at Wesleying! #SBCFreeSince2006

8 Netflix Rom-Coms to Watch post-V-Day

You know when it’s after Valentine’s Day and you’ve just had like 8 hours of class and you like, didn’t really care about Valentine’s Day but like,, you cared enough to maybe watch something about it and now you’re on Netflix and scrolling past all those thumbnails with two people smiling at each other and biting their lip and just wish there was a way to know which of those thumbnails was worth your sweet sweet time?? You’re in luck! I watched 8 Netflix Original rom coms and ranked them so you don’t have to. So, get under those covers, put on the face mask you got last semester from RiteAid, and treat yourself to one of these eight amazingly mediocre Valentine’s Day themed movies <3

blog love is best love

it’s almost valentine’s day, and love is in the air <3

we bring this up not to torture all you single folk (we feel you on that front) or get all gushy, but because bwog (columbia’s version of wesleying) has been running a personals series in the weeks leading up to valentine’s day to help bring love to their readers, and today’s personal was… another blog: nyu local!!! while we’re a little insulted that we weren’t crushed on from afar (but we suppose that is more of a wescrushes thing), we were happy to see the budding romance between bwog and nyu local, and wanted to add our affection to the mix!

nyc might be 2+ hours away physically, but thanks to the ~magical powers of the internet~ we believe that this long-distance love can find a way <3

see below the email exchange that followed:

why is this school literally macklemore

I remember the first full-price clothing item I ever bought. No discounts. No coupon. It was my first semester at Wesleyan, and I had to get a black dress for my WesWinds concert. My mom and I had gone to Zara to check their overwhelmingly black aesthetic, and I found a black dress with a lace top. I thought it was the perfect dress until I checked the price tag. $50. We both knew that we would have to wait forever for that dress to go on sale, and I didn’t own an appropriate dress for my concert, which was quickly approaching.

My mom gave me a look and said hadi, which translates into a bunch of things in English. It can mean come on, let’s, but in this situation, it meant, we’re going to ignore the price because this is a pretty dress. Screw it, let’s buy it. It also meant, let’s do this quickly before my wallet changes its mind.

For most of my life, I’ve been much more accustomed to hand-me-downs and clearance rack finds than full-price fashions and expensive trends. Growing up, my favorite outfit was a sequined denim jumpsuit that had been passed down to me. This was, in retrospect, absolutely ridiculous and marginally over-the-top for a pre-teen to wear, but it was special to me. Our hand-me-down system was cross-continental: my friend’s mom would pass down her daughter’s clothes to me, where I would get some use out of it, and then those clothes were packed away to be brought to my cousins in Turkey, where the cascade of hand-me-downs began again: starting with one of the middle cousins, to the one slightly younger, to the second-cousin-twice-removed-or-what-we-just-call-cousin down the line. As long as it was in wearable condition, it was passed down.

Upon one of my visits back home, I saw one of my cousins wearing a dress that I remember wearing in elementary school: white, with some red, orange, and yellow flowers scattered along the hem and waistline. It was one of my favorite dresses; now, it had been passed down two bodies before reaching my cousin’s closet.

The topic of clothing within a low-income family is complex: a web of societal standards of dress combined with financial barriers. I had learned quickly that my mom and I could not afford regular-priced clothing, so our trips to the Gap consisted of darting toward the sale section, calculating sales tax on each item, never crossing the line between clearance and regular-priced, avoiding lusting over a dress that we couldn’t afford. My wardrobe’s guiding logic was out of season: we bought summer clothes in the winter when it went on sale and winter clothes at the beginning of summer, estimating how much I would grow in the meantime. On the few occasions my mom and I went through the in-season section, we would take a mental note on the clothes we would wait to go on clearance, eventually buying them a few months later. This was our process; we waited for coupons, for credit card rewards, for the hand-me-downs supplementing my needs in the meantime.

BOOKSLEYING: COME READ WITH US

Welcome to 2019, where we all decide to embark on a new resolution to eat healthier, maybe make it to Freeman, or actually go to class for once.

Saadia (sdzand I have been exchanging book recommendations for some time now, and after a caps-lock induced discussion, the Book-slying was born/birthed/created. I’ve decided to invest in some self-care by reading a book at least every two weeks, and instead of incessantly posting about the books I read on Instagram, I (we) will take the time to review what we’ve been procrastinating our work with.

But let’s be honest, I will continue to incessantly post about the books I’m reading. It’s just the way I am.

The goal for this series is to come with a book review every week, alternating between the two of us, making each of us responsible for a book every two weeks. Melisa reads a lot, Saadia does not. This is an attempt to bridge that gap.

Read below the jump for an explanation of the rating system!

Procrastination Destination: 10 Fast Fingers

Welcome to the fourth installment of Procrastination Destination, where Wesleying provides you #content to get you through finals!

Hello fellow procrastinators! I, like many (most) of you, have countless essays to write this finals szn. And I’m sure, like many (most) of you, you have an increasingly limited amount of time to complete said essays this finals szn.

However, if any of you find yourself in a place where you feel your typing is not fast enough, that if only you could transport your brilliant thoughts to paper at a more rapid pace you could get the “A” you’ve always wanted in that really hard soc class, I have found an activity for you.

You need look no further than the website 10 Fast Fingers, which will test how many words you can type per minute, or your “RPM”.

Procrastination Destination: COOK YO SELF SOME CUPCAKES :)

Welcome to the third installment of Procrastination Destination, where Wesleying provides you #content to get you through finals!

If you’re the same type of perpetually stressed as I am, then you also decide to bake/make/chef-it-up during finals season to take some productive time off from studying or staring at Netflix, pretending to study. Baking is a ~thing that I do~ while blasting some dramatic music because at least I’m doing something, even if it isn’t homework.

I have a slightly well-known recipe for Mocha Spice cupcakes that I came up with after experimenting in the kitchen a few years back. They’ve made their way to Wesleyan a few times, notably when I baked over three dozen and delivered them to students after spring break. I normally try to bake a batch while I’m home and share the ~goods~ with friends, and it’s quickly become a favorite treat.

The thing is, I don’t *really* have a recipe. I follow this Turkish thing called göz ayar?, which directly translates to eye measurement, which completely makes sense (I hope). Essentially, I know how much to throw into the measuring bowl after making these cupcakes time and time again. The point is, the recipe’s ingredients are always in a dynamic flux depending on what I have laying at home.

The “recipe” I’m going to share is meant to be broken; it’s meant to be experimented with. If you don’t like a particular ingredient, literally just take it out. Wanna add something? Go for it! This recipe is supposed to look like absolute freakin’ chaos…because it is. This is essentially the cupcake in its core, and sometimes I play around with some ~extras~, which I’ll let you know about after getting that not-so-stable cupcake foundation set.

Procrastination Destination: Google Alerts Round Up

Welcome to the second installment of Procrastination Destination, where Wesleying provides you #content to get you through finals!

At least once a day, we get a Google Alerts email in the staff inbox letting us know when Wesleyan is mentioned around the web. Lately, I’ve been collecting some of the more interesting links, but no one has gotten around to actually writing a full post about any of them. Instead of just sitting on this collection, I figured, what do millennials love more than a good listicle? So here we are!

Read below the jump for a collection of recent-ish alumni, student, professor, and Middletown news!