Alright, look, I know orange palm trees aren’t the same as pumpkins but…
It’s that time of year again – Halloween! Are you ready to stuff your face with chocolates? Carve pumpkins with your confused visiting parents? Freeze your ass off on Fountain because you decided to be an attractive citrus fruit? (that last one might just be me)
It’s true, Halloween is a fun time to be your best freaky self. It’s also true that Halloween has led to some pretty shitty behavior on college campuses, which is worth mentioning every year. Why? Because no matter how much insensitive Halloween costumes get admonished in the national news, they keep happening.
Here’s some sage advice: If you’re wondering if your Halloween costume perpetuates racist/sexist/ableist/classist stereotypes…well, if you’re wondering at all, it probably does. Nevertheless, some students at UMass Amherst made a chart to help you out.
Additionally, looming over this year’s festivities is a rather stressful and scary election coming up in less than two weeks. Even though there’s a strong likelihood that our next president won’t be a spray-tan orange pumpkin, 2016 has left us with much to be disillusioned by regarding our political system. It doesn’t matter whether you’re for Hillary or Stein or Johnson or Bernie ;( or the goddamn Babadook – 2016 has been a fucking nightmare.
Here at Wesleying, we can’t promise we’ll soothe all of your political fear or anger. But this Halloweekend, we encourage you to go out, dance yrself clean, get consensually weird with your crush at a house party, and shake out those 2016 demons. Looking for some Halloween tunes that aren’t all cheesy/novelty tracks nor dubstep-y witch-house? Check out our robust 64-song playlist after the jump:
I forgot to include “I have an all male team for my thesis film and the department is paying me money to do it”
On Monday morning, I woke up to find that a meme I had created had been posted to WesAdmits.
Labeled “Wesleyan Film Bro Starter Pack,” it was a compilation of ~quirky~ attributes and personality traits of male Wesleyan film majors, including plaid shirts, a Letterboxd membership, and a text I may or may not have once actually received: “I have a projector in my room want to come over”.
I was flattered by the overwhelmingly positive reaction to it – especially from film students, of all genders – and terrified that I might now be on Jeanine Basinger’s Most Wanted list. But the meme made its true debut a week ago, when I posted it to the semi-secret Facebook meme group, We$ Hookupz 2020.
Yes, you heard that right: if you didn’t know already, there is a semi-secret Facebook meme group called We$ Hookupz 2020, dedicated to Wesleyan-centric memes, and it’s where my drag of the Wesleyan Film BroTM was born. What’s more, my creation is just one of many “Wesleyan Student Starter Pack” memes that have been posted in the group, a trend spearheaded by three of We$ Hookupz’s admins: Aviv Rau ‘19, Angel Riddle ‘19, and Camilla Lopez ‘19.
So, with the permission of the creators, here are some of the other Wesleyan Starter Packs available on the Internet. First off, a familiar *~aesthetic~* from the loud side of Usdan…
“This guy gives me nightmares” – me
David Barton holding up a finger for each of his deep-seeded insecurities.
It’s not every day that a creationist utters the words “Wesleyan College.” But when they do (and you quickly fact check that they’re not talking about the REAL Wesleyan College in Macon, Georgia), you’re likely in for a hoot.
David Barton is a sad sad man. According to his website (which is really fugly by the way), he is the “Founder and President of WallBuilders, a national pro-family organization that presents America’s forgotten history and heroes, with an emphasis on our moral, religious and constitutional heritage.”
I am hyped up, off-campus, riding on the coattails of Friday the 13th… yet, somehow, I find myself typing on Wesleying just to guide you in procrastinating both finals and packing to gtfo campus. To help you in your quest for distraction, I leave you with the following top three most popular Alternate Reality Youtube Series following one of the creepiest, most obsessively followed myths of the internet – Slenderman. (Couldn’t you tell by the title?)
I know this is a pretty big claim but throwback Bar Mitzvah-esque tunes might just be my favorite thing in all of cyberspace. For all of you who didn’t have the experience that is a Jewish coming of age ceremony, simply imagine a crowd of pre-pubescent tweens, shitfaced middle aged Jewish professionals, and your grandparents and all of their closest friends shaking their ~tuchus~ to these tunes. Sufficiently horrified?
Anyway, I’ve curated a selection I feel sums up the vibe. Admittedly, I’ve been listening to these while studying all semester and they’re awesome. So awesome, in fact, that my non-Jewish friends now all want to be Bar Mitzvah-ed. Such is the power of the Bar Mitzvah tune.
Let’s start with a classic: the Hora. Except that this Hora is re-imagined as all the worst parts of music production circa 2007 rolled into one. Warning: you will find yourself singing this one. I’ve caught at least three of my friends listening to this while they study.
Finals have begun, you don’t know how much caffeine you’ve had but you’re permanently vaguely nauseous, all your wescam correspondence is happening between 2 and 5AM, and–for some reason–panic hasn’t set in yet. What better time, then, to watch videos of inanimate objects participating in “sport”? I somehow know the Kentucky Derby happened this weekend, and I imagine this is at least as exciting. Check below the jump for more things neither one of us should be spending our time on.
Selene Canter ’19 and Ally Gomberoff ’19 write in:
For our Feminist Philosophy final project, we invite you to come pull
an all-nighter to support victims of sexual trauma and discuss the
ways we as a campus can step up for each other to make our community
Inspired by Cressida J Heyes’ piece “Dead to the World; Rape,
Unconsciousness, and Social Media,” we will be “pulling an
all-nighter” in order to stay vigilant for those whose sleep is no
longer restful or safe as a result of sexual trauma. When a victim is
assaulted while unconscious, their agency is doubly vialated, for not
only is their body now a site of trauma, but they no longer have a
safe healing space in their sleep. Moreover, when an unconscious
sexual assault is shared via social media (for example the
Steubenville High School rape in 2014), the victim’s trauma is
continually replicated as images of their body without their will go
Our project aims to discuss issues of unconsciousness, campus rape
culture, the importance of sleep, and how we can step up for each
other, to support those who have experienced sexual assault and to
deter these traumatic experiences from happening.
Join us for a discussion and some interactive activities at 11
followed by some time to reflect, hang out, and cram for finals from
12:30 until 8am. We would love to have some of you stay the whole
night, but feel free to drop in and out as you pleaseSince you’ll
likely be pulling an all-nighter some time in the next week, why not
learn how you can make our campus safer while you’re at it? Coffee and
yummy snacks will be provided to keep us going all night.
Date: Sunday, May 8-Monday, May 9
Time: 11:00 PM – 8:00 AM
Place: Westco Lounge
Alexis Jimenez ’19 writes in:
Come see Wesleyan’s one and only fire spinning troupe, PROMETHEUS, as we show off our firey moves this Thursday at 7:30 PM on Foss Hill! Seating is very much not limited, so bring your friends, bring your prefrosh, bring your friends’ prefrosh! It should be a fine night, but bring warm clothing just in case.
Time: 7:30 PM
Where: Foss Hill
This isn’t a thinkpiece. This isn’t #realjournalism. This isn’t a tortured artist declaring that “objectivity is dead!” I know what you’re thinking: if not these, than is this article even Wesleyan? Is this article even real?
Perhaps more pressing a question is: “Is this day even real?” Johnny Lazebnik ’16 thinks so maybe (or at least thinks we should celebrate it). Let me tell you, it isn’t. Today is more extra than the random ass beach volleyball court behind Bennet (but less extra than the GODDAM TUITION INCREASE THAT THE BOARD UNANIMOUSLY VOTED ON). The folks over at the Career Center see today as “24 extra hours to do something productive.” See Instagram post below:
It’s that time of year again: your friends are all starting to announce their plans for the summer. Their paying, professional, real-live adult plans. Meanwhile, if you’re anything like me, you’re probably lying in bed with one hand in a box of cereal and the other aimlessly scrolling through your Twitter feed in hopes that if you ignore the problem of summer plans, it will go away. If you starting to feel the weight of the world (i.e. your parent’s disapproving stares at your choice of major) falling on your shoulders, don’t worry: your friends here at Wesleying are here to help!