“I just don’t wanna celebrate a bullshit holiday. I’m plenty romantic. I own a home and have never shit my pants. Two things you can’t say.” —ShitMyDadSays

Happy Monday, kids. Things are happening in the world!

Here’s a brief collection of five major headlines from the day (some Wes-related, some not) far more interesting to me than what you are doing—or not doing—for Valentine’s Day. Dig it.