Spring semester is now fully underway – and with that comes the renewed efforts to get a job because never have you been in as much debt as you are in this moment.  A seventh of the population of Wesleyan is now probably transfers, and all the cushy year long job positions are full. It’s too cold and wet for potential employers to post flyers with information you need; and so you turn to the internet to get hired…. and face it, the internet turns back at you and gives you the judgemental once over, looking at the literal and metaphorical sweatpants you have inhabited since the snow started.

So, let’s be honest here – we’ve all ignored the “you must be over thirteen to join this site” clause and have been on social media since the grim days of Myspace and AIM chat. Ahhh, the internet.

But, more seriously, we have ourselves spread extremely thin – you Snapchat™ your best friend so they will respond to you on Facebook™, only so you can link them to your Instagram™ post – which is, of course, a screenshot of you vaguely being salty and calling someone out on Twitter™. Oh, that’s only me? Anyway, we’ve got a lot of places where we speak, and, while that’s great for fostering self-expression – it might not be the expression you choose to share with your bosses/professors/anyone who has access to $$$. Because we all want that $$$ – [insert broke college student joke here].

Without further ado, here is an Unofficial Guide to Managing Your Internet Self