We’re in a tough spot. Our age group has to deal with a melting planet, a thriving possum population, and a plethora of potential employers that expect us to know how to use Excel. That sucks for us sassy NESCAC kids. In spite of these obstacles, there is supposed to be a light in the dark, a city upon a hill, a beautiful beacon of hope: memes.
But, alas, Wesleyan’s meme culture is less than ideal. I would call it bad.
Editor’s note: The original post incorrectly identified the URL of the site as wesmaps.com. We apologize for the error and will fact-check our memes more thoroughly in the future.
Featuring a tiled background of “If Michael Roth Was A Character From Harry Potter, He Would Be Dumbledore, Says Michael Roth,” the site is evocative of geocities. This seems like a fitting tribute to the 10 year anniversary of the inauguration of Michael Roth ’78 as Wesleyan’s President, which just so happens to be today.
You can add to the message board on the left side, which currently has posts like, “Can I access moodle from this” from guest and ‘i hate this’ from our very own michael roth.
In the center of the site, there’s the infamous bagel pb&j that haunted Soggy We$ Memes in a 3-post saga (courtesy of Oren Maximov ’17), complete with a poll to respond to the question of whether the bagel pb&j is indeed a sandwich.
At the bottom of the page there’s this gem (the button tragically doesn’t work, so you’re stuck with the points calculator):
There’s also a button saying, “Click here to go to the real Wesportal,” but, in an infuriating game of cat and mouse, it moves everytime you try to click on it.
We are extremely curious who did this, so if you have any leads, send them our way (staff[at]wesleying[dot]org)!
“For your viewing pleasure”
–Ed Thorndike ’89 of WesWings
Alright, ya’ll. It’s the day that we all look forward to. It’s the end of Spooptober, the start of Christmas, because we can’t capitalize off of Thanksgiving, unless it’s Black Friday.
It’s Halloween. And did ya’ll impress. We asked (yesterday) for your costumes, and
I think my eyes are still burning I’m very impressed by the creativity of the student body.
Check out the costumes after the jump!
On Monday morning, I woke up to find that a meme I had created had been posted to WesAdmits.
Labeled “Wesleyan Film Bro Starter Pack,” it was a compilation of ~quirky~ attributes and personality traits of male Wesleyan film majors, including plaid shirts, a Letterboxd membership, and a text I may or may not have once actually received: “I have a projector in my room want to come over”.
I was flattered by the overwhelmingly positive reaction to it – especially from film students, of all genders – and terrified that I might now be on Jeanine Basinger’s Most Wanted list. But the meme made its true debut a week ago, when I posted it to the semi-secret Facebook meme group, We$ Hookupz 2020.
Yes, you heard that right: if you didn’t know already, there is a semi-secret Facebook meme group called We$ Hookupz 2020, dedicated to Wesleyan-centric memes, and it’s where my drag of the Wesleyan Film BroTM was born. What’s more, my creation is just one of many “Wesleyan Student Starter Pack” memes that have been posted in the group, a trend spearheaded by three of We$ Hookupz’s admins: Aviv Rau ‘19, Angel Riddle ‘19, and Camilla Lopez ‘19.
So, with the permission of the creators, here are some of the other Wesleyan Starter Packs available on the Internet. First off, a familiar *~aesthetic~* from the loud side of Usdan…
“Living the American Dream… ironically.”
Wesleyan lives on the internet—unofficially, at least—in all sorts of sordid places. There is Urban Dictionary, where we are known for our “women with mustaches” and “sunshine bathed, rainbow draped, ‘hurt me not my tree’ philosophy.” There is The Onion, where we are celebrated for our lavish dinner parties and anti-straw activism. There is CollegeConfidential, where “johnwesley” rules the land and prefrosh wonder if the girls shave. There is Wesleyan’s Subreddit, where Lord Michael S. Roth VIII, Esq. M.D. P.h.D., W.E.S., offers the occasional AMA. (Sample quote: “The dark ages was probably one of the most boring periods in my great existence.”)
Then there is the Wesleyan Cardinal Meme Generation, created last semester by an anonymous ACB user. There are eight pages of memes, all drawing on the same iconic Cardinal smile, dating back to January. They involve classes, Eclectic, Das Racist, streaking, Weshop, Foss, and Hammie the Hamster—everything that is anything at this prestigious institution of learning. But according to its creator, the stock is running low. I never thought I’d use the phrase “needs more memes” on the Internet, but there it is. Thankfully, Meme Generator is open to submissions.
To those of you still working on things and such: God help you. (Unless you’re Christopher Hitchens.) To those of you living under a rock in the shape of Olin Library these past few days: GOP presidential hopeful Rick Perry has a new campaign video! It’s called “Strong,” and YouTube comments are disabled for a reason: it’s mighty controversial. In the ad, Perry decries fights back against the liberal plot to ban Christmas, decrying “liberal attacks on our religious heritage” and declaring, “There’s something wrong in this country when gays can serve openly in the military but our kids can’t openly celebrate Christmas or pray in school.” He begins by assuring that he’s not ashamed to be a Christian, and then walks up a weirdly sloped hill.
It began as a plea for the evangelical vote. It has ended up as one of the best memes of 2011, inspiring a Twitter hashtag (#XmasWarDiaries), a brilliant Tumblr, and about a bazillion YouTube parodies.
Spring semester is over, Reunion and Commencement is days past, and I’ve flown 2/3 of the way across the country from Connecticut, so I guess it’s official: the school year is over (for most). And it’s been a pretty crazy one. So this is farewell. Farewell to eager-eyed freshmen getting acquainted to their EastCo dorm rooms, some of us dropping two classes at the beginning of the semester (to pick up three more), and punk concerts in Memorial Chapel. Farewell to Fall Break being too short, exam week too long, and Winter Break even more too longer.
Farewell to the first Snow Day since the last time a cult leader claimed the Rapture was coming. Farewell to snickering to ourselves or the ACB while scrolling through prefrosh facebook groups. Farewell to ruining my hearing forever. Farewell to Wordsmith, Mel and Josh (as a duo [for the moment]), Flora and Fauna, and any/every other outbound artist I’ve neglected to list here. Farewell to controversy?
Farewell to fuckyeahnouns facebook event pictures (hopefully not for long). Farewell to anonymous commenters (or not, am I right?!). Farewell to WeScam. Farewell to the University hiring people to wash chalking away from the top of Foss Hill, to the ire of students, alumni, and even random documentary filmmakers (seriously: ask Zach or myself about the documentary filmmakers).
But most of all, farewell to…idk, lol.
I feel now the most tasteful way to send you all off to your jobs, internships, or sudden urges to backpack around Europe is with a random video found by searching “wesleyan goodbye” on YouTube…so here you go. Here’s to doin’ it even nastier next year (Save the Date: Werner Herzog’s 69th Birthday).
Skiddoo your kids! Skiddoo your wife! YouTube’s April Fool’s joke is pretty fantastic: a wildly clever glimpse at what the site would’ve looked like back in 1911, appropriating a laundry list of 2011-era memes for the horse-and-buggy set. (Try and name them all, or just click here.)
More from YouTube’s blog:
It’s hard to believe that just a century ago, YouTube was a fledgling video site for paupers and presidents alike. Today, we celebrate 100 years of YouTube, and we thought we would reflect on our inaugural year with a re-print of our first blog post from 1911. In honor of this milestone, today’s homepage is a reproduction of how you might have viewed it 100 years ago. Check out some of the most popular videos of the time and be sure to try out our new upload mode which summons a horse-drawn carriage to pick up your video submission from your home. Here’s to another epoch of great video!
Mostly, though, I just want to scope out YouTube 2111. Someone make it happen.