If I have to tell you about what’s going on with need-blind at Wesleyan right now, you seriously don’t spend enough time on this blog (and are definitely not that girl I’ve been hitting on with subtle references to my Wesleying persona). Seriously, guys(/gals/zes), we talk about this all the fucking time (context context context context context context context and a .gif).
In brief: our embattled president, Rothzilla, has engaged the fearsome budget monster Mo(ney)thra, which of course seems nice to everybody at first, because hey, who wants to deal with that devilish flying thing stalking us at every turn? However, it turns out that Rothzilla is keeping Mo(ney)thra under control using some extremely non-kosher methods, namely by destroying Tokyo in the process (or undercutting the moral values of Wesleyan by “discriminating against poor people,” as one student phrased it—whichever fits this illogical reimagining best). The background of all this includes numerous conspiracy theories about a cover-up (i.e., issues with transparency), a convoluted origin story, and the meddling hands of Ishiro Honda (ok, maybe that last one is a little less accurate).
Why reflect on all this now? Well, it appears that the traditional news media has taken the bait. What follows is a collection of interpretations of the need-blind issue, courtesy of the good folks over in the fourth branch of the government. Read on, dear readers, for the (slightly more coherent) perspective from the outside.