Welcome to the fourth installment of Ask Wesleying, an advice column about any and all things Wes! Have a question about life at Wes? Submit it to get it answered in Ask Wesleying! You can find all of the Ask Wesleying columns here.
This week’s question is about party culture at Wes:
Dear Wesleying,
I hate parties! How can I avoid them and still have fun on the weekends?
Sincerely,
Secretly a Grandma
You can read the answer to this week’s question below the jump!
Non-seniors, this is the kind of event you can look forward to having later on. No word on what happens if you self-identify as a senior. From Ross Wells Gormley ’13:
This Saturday afternoon, come hang out in the backyards of Fountain/Pine with your fellow classmates for a welcome back SENIORS ONLY event!
Bring your blankets, frisbees, drinks/ID’s (Wesleyan and state-issued), and enjoy some tasty fare including grilled chicken, vegan dishes, and salads. There will also be performances by Smokin’ Lillies, IGBEE aka Bruce Durley, and Bones Complex.
A senior pass (a pass to Senior Cocktails, formal and semi-formal, and other outings) will be raffled along with a foosball table, Wes apparel, and gift certificates to local eateries. Tickets cost $1 each and a portion of the proceeds will go towards our Senior Gift.
If you prowl The Daily Beast every day like I don’t, you may have come across this article, entitled When Sex Isn’t Sexy: My Bizzare Education at Yale. The article was written by a recent Yale graduate, Nathan Harden ’09, who also recently wrote a book in a similar vein (Sex and God at Yale: Porn, Political Correctness, and a Good Education Gone Bad). As some of you may remember, Wesleyan was ranked the #1 Horniest school in the country by The Daily Beast, right ahead of our good friends down the river at Yale. According to most Wes kids, we probably deserved that ranking both academically and socially.
Read on past the jump for a summary of Harden’s (whose surname may or may not be topically ironic) opinions on this burgeoning academic phenomenon of sex in the classroom (pun possibly intended), or more specifically my opinions on his opinions.
Yesterday, a group of unidentified students at Yale University posted this video for a chess.com video contest. Although it definitely does not live up to the wittiness and splendor of Party on Fountain or even Midd Kid, it can provide you with some serious finals week lolz:
“I will smash through your defenses with my tactical tricks
why you playing the French, when this is a blitz, fool?”
Laiya A. ’15 notes that this rhyme is fantastic because “fool rhymes with tricks much better than blitz. Also, the line is placing them in the role of Nazis. Why are frat boys filming a chess video??!??!” With all the early decision/action drama going on, I am personally extremely thankful I was rejected from Yale EA back in 2008.
Additional notable quotes:
No, I’d really prefer if you didn’t teach “chess” to me.
1) I just looked up. The clouds are moving pretty quickly today.
2) We’ve been doing the Wesleying Unofficial Orientation Series for two weeks now; if you’re new, feel free to read up.
3) Below is probably the most important part of your orientation. Pay attention.
Continuing the unending parade of often mediocre college rap videos, the ACB brings you TECHnically Sound’s debut track of 2010, WESTECH State of Mind:
Could’ve done a better job editing out Alicia Keys during the chorus, but it certainly puts Midd Kid to shame, at least in this writer’s opinion. Thoughts?
[Edit by Sheek] If confused, cf. WesLingo to make sense of “WesTech”.Also anyone else who made Wes-related parodies for Rock and R&B, send us them!
As Syed pointed out, we may not have our own admissions musical filled with shiny happy students or Auto-Tuned rap video about our Nalgenes and LAX bros.
But don’t forget Party on Fountain:
We had a customized party anthem and music video before those MIDD KIDS even matriculated. Dear Gawker: please be gentle.
Aural Wes posted a video of “Party on Fountain” today. I was feeling so-so about the song when I first heard it, but this video is seriously excellent. Check it out:
