Y’all, we’ve finally made it. The Daily Wire (the stupid conservative news outlet created by short-but-not-a-king pundit Ben Shapiro) wrote an EXCLUSIVE article article entitled “Wesleyan Encourages Students To Masturbate, Take ‘Kink Quizzes’ In Mandatory COVID Module”. Apparently they had an ~informant~ in the student body that alerted them to the anti-American, pro-Communist things that the Wesleyan COVID Moodle was telling us about sex. And let me tell you, this article is one of the best things I’ve ever read.
Most of the graffiti is actually very inclusive!
For most of this year, the second-floor SciLi carrels have been my study space of choice. They’re quieter than the lunch-with-your-friends-disguised-as-studying of first-floor SciLi, but allow for slightly more noise than in Olin, where I feel guilty for just unzipping my backpack. They have a good amount of natural light, and their cute little walls protect me from making eye contact with anyone else working there, so I can sink into the false sense of solitude that I so desperately need. But an added bonus is that many of the carrels have some *high quality* graffiti from all the students that have studied there before, providing ample entertainment and procrastination fodder. And for your reading privilege, I have compiled the highlights. Click below for some anxiety-fueled musings. (Please note that I take no responsibility for any misspellings, botched punctuation, or opinions. All errors belong to the authors themselves.)
Welcome to the first installment of Ask Wesleying, an advice column about any and all things Wes! Have a question about life at Wes? Submit it to get it answered in Ask Wesleying! You can find all of the Ask Wesleying columns here.
This week’s question is about something that’s on many people’s minds with the start of Local Co-op:
Why are all of my hookups always in line for co-op RIGHT when I get there? Why are they all friends? Why is co-op pickup scheduled such that I can’t go home and change into a cute outfit beforehand so that all of my hookups see how hot I am in co-op line? UGH!
Local Co-Op, Local-er Hookups
You can read the answer to this week’s question below the jump!
Wescam launched last Thursday and although it’s only been 6 days since then, I haven’t entered a single public space on campus without overhearing the noun (Wescam), the verb (wescam), the preterite form of the verb (wescammed), the gerund (wescamming), the adjective (wescammy), and/or occasionally the adverb (wescamly). And, as I mentioned in my previous announcement post, we are doing a write in!
Our past write-ins have been some of our most viewed articles ever. The Orgasm Chronicles now has 41,890 views. WOW.
How this works: (1) Submit an anonymous entry to the Google form after the jump, (2) Make sure you tell us a Wescam story; you won’t be posted if this isn’t tangentially or totally Wescam related, (3) Tell your friends and wescams to write in! We don’t always get a high enough volume of quality entries to warrant a post, and that should not happen. So tell people to submit!
WesKink writes in:
Interested in kink/BDSM? Polyamory/non-mongamy? Just curious? WesKink offers a safe space to learn and explore!
Answer questions like:
Is kink always sexual?
How do I safely tie up my partner?
What does BDSM stand for?
How can I talk to my partner about what I want?
WesKink is a group for any Wesleyan student interested in kink, BDSM, non-monogamy and polyamory, or any other alternative sex/relationship practices. Our meetings provide a safe space for discussion of these topics open to people of all identities and experience levels. Together we learn about the wide variety of things under the kink umbrella, and how to explore those things safely and consensually!
Like all our meetings, this is open to the campus at large! Everyone is welcome, regardless of interest or experience level! This meeting will focus on defining kink and providing an idea of what WesKink is all about. We’ll pass around some toys, talk about kink, and get to know one another. Snacks will be provided!
Can’t make the meeting but interested? Email wesleyankink[at]gmail[dot]com to get on the listserve!
RSVP to the Facebook Event here
Date: Monday, February 13th
Place: Usdan 108
It’s that time of year again …. the annual Wesleyan production of The Vagina Monologues !!!!!
Eve Ensler’s The Vagina Monologues is a series of monologues about bodies, sex, empowerment, and love.
PROCEEDS FROM TICKET SALES BENEFIT THE LOCAL MIDDLETOWN DOMESTIC VIOLENCE SHELTER (New Horizons). http://www.newhorizonsdv.com/about_us
Tickets will be sold at the Usdan box office starting on Tuesday
Performances will be held in Memorial Chapel
Thursday (2/11) – 8PM
Friday (2/12) – 8PM
Saturday (2/13) – 8PM
The show runs 90 minutes.
Christine Elizabeth Clarke
Meg de Recat
Date: Thursday, February 11 – Saturday, February 13
Time: All shows begin at 8 PM
Place: Memorial Chapel
Cost: $6 tickets — Usdan box office
From Brenna Tharnstrom ’16:
Come to Usdan this Saturday from 8pm-12am to SexPress Yourself with SALD and WesWell!
Babeland will open the night hosting one of their amazing workshops!
All night there will be an awesome and pleasurable sexual health carnival! The first 50 attendees will receive a free sex toy! But if you miss that mark, you can always participate in the activities at all the different tables, and enter a raffle to pick a fancy sex toy of your choosing!
Let’s have fun and learn some sexciting new stuff!
Date: Saturday, November 14th
From WesWell comes this announcement:
Check out all of the sexy events during Sexual Health Week (April 20-24)! Brought to you by WesWell & your friendly Peer Health Advocates!
As an undergraduate at Wesleyan, Debra Haffner ’76 was a vocal activist for social justice and co-founder of Wesleyan’s first Women’s Center. Since graduation, Rev. Haffner has held leadership roles at Planned Parenthood, SIECUS, and other non-profit organizations. Most recently, she founded the Religious Institute, a multi-faith organization dedicated to advocating for sexual health, education, and justice in faith communities and society.
Rev. Haffner will talk about her career working for the rights of women and families, how to create and grow social impact organizations, and how a Wesleyan education prepares you to change the world. Lunch will be provided.
Date: Wednesday, April 22
Time: 12:00 – 1:00 PM
Place: Usdan 108
Cost: Free! Register.
So there’s that thing about Wesleyan being the horniest college, right? Well, part of that reputation might come from the fact that when busy seniors decide to pursue a year-long research project (re: thesis), most of them get a personal carrel in which to study/research/reach academic enlightenment. And when students hear about this simultaneously public and private space, the next question is easy: Have you had sex in it?
Thanks to a 1995 article from the Argus, it’s been a THESISCRAZY thing to ask you if you’ve been doing the boopity boop in your confined academic spaces. So if you’re a 2015er scrambling to wrap up what’s been a two-semester process, you received a survey a couple weeks ago about how you’ve been spending your time in your (or someone else’s) carrel. Out of the 97 carrel-having people doing theses this year, 33% responded to this bangin’ survey.
Let’s just say people really know how to get busy in their carrels. Find the results after the jump!