Tag Archives: vomit

Here’s Why Senior Cocks Got Shut Down in Two Hours Last Night

Spoiler: It involves sex, drugs, and rock & roll projectile vomiting.

Last night, around 7:30 p.m., a few hundred well-oiled members of the Class of 2013 piled into buses outside of Usdan, headed—unbeknownst to passengers—to the Connecticut Science Center in Hartford. Two hours later, a drunker, louder, and scientifically inspired Class of 2013 was herded onto the same buses and driven right back to Middletown. The “Freaks and Geeks, Valentine’s Day style”-themed evening—which cost $40 and made for the third senior event of the year—wasn’t supposed to end abruptly in less than two hours, but according to one student who overheard an exchange between museum staffers and Wesleyan coordinators, the ejection may have been well earned.

“I overheard that staffers at the Connecticut Science Center observed students ‘doing drugs and having sex in the bathrooms,’ and that things were getting broken,” explained the student, who asked not to be named. “I am not sure whether or to what extent that is exaggerated or not; it was said rather offhandedly and by someone who appeared to be under a lot of duress at the time.”

If you noticed copious amounts of baking soda lining the stairs of the museum, that, too, had something to do with the staff’s unhappy reaction.

Noro is Back

PSA: Stop reading Wesleying and wash your hands. Again.

This is not a drill. Anyone who caught the plague last semester may have been lulled into a false sense of security, but be warned: the unwelcome invader that had you leaning over a toilet last spring (on a weeknight) is back for a sequel, and it wants revenge. This morning, the Health Center Staff sent out a Public Health Advisory informing the student body of a recent increase of stomach flu in the surrounding area. In case you still haven’t figured out why you’re vomiting, a helpful description of the norovirus’ symptoms was provided:

The onset of gastroenteritis may be gradual (over 12-24 hours) or more sudden, sometimes waking students from sleep with a bout of nausea and vomiting, accompanied in some cases by headache, dizziness, sense of temperature disequilibrium and fatigue.  In some cases the diarrhea starts immediately, but in most it starts about 12 hours after the vomiting, which has usually resolved by that time.

The no-no virus is usually transmitted via a fecal-oral route. In other words, WASH YO HANDS. And for the last time, please stop eating poop, guys.

The Health Center additionally warns that, should you fall prey to this most vicious ailment, “the intervening hours are miserable.” Prepare yourselves. E-mail your Global Change and Infectious Disease professor. It’s only a matter of time before the enemy infiltrates Old Meth. E-mail provided after the jump.