Wesleyan machine prices DESTROYED with facts and logic

To attend Wesleyan University is to participate in a constant struggle against price gouging. But all is not lost, for if you remain vigilant, you can find refuge against greedflation in unlikely places. To illustrate this point, I’ll start by examining this vending machine, located on the ground floor of the Olin Library:

My field research has indicated Wesleyan’s on-campus vending machine layouts consistently follow this pattern:

• Rows A & B: Large chip bags (~2½ ounces/servings), $2.75.

• Row C: Medium chip bags (~1½ ounces/servings), $1.75. There used to be two rows of these, but they switched row B to the large bags so that they could make people pay more without having to increase unit prices.

• Row D: Pastries, $2.00.

• Row E: Regular-size candy, $2.00, which is a ridiculous price to be paying for a single bag of Skittles.

• Row F: Large candy, $4.00.

• Row G: Does not exist.

• Row H: Gum and hard candy, may as well not exist given that it’s buried at the bottom.

Now let’s do some math. That bag of Lay’s Classic potato chips is $2.75 for 2½ ounces. That works out to…

$2.75 ÷ 2.5 = $1.10 per ounce

I believe the technical term for this is “highway robbery.”

Now here’s where it gets interesting. At Weshop, they sell single-serving (1-oz) bags of chips that are meant to be sides for your Weshop lunch, but you can buy them at any time of day. And how much do they price-gouge us on those?

Just kidding, they don’t! But only because Frito-Lay prints the prices on the bags so Bon Appetit’s hands are tied. Officially it’s 2 for $1 or 59¢ each, but in practice they just charge you 50¢, probably because it’s easier to set that up on the cash register. Even by 2010s pre-inflation standards, that’s dirt cheap.

While the bags are smaller than what you can get at the vending machines, they’re worth 50¢ per ounce, which means you could get more than twice the chips for the same price. For example, you could get five 1-oz bag of chips for $1.50 at Weshop, and that would still be cheaper than getting one 2½-oz bag for $2.75.

In conclusion: never buy chips at the on-campus vending machines. There are some snacks that Weshop doesn’t sell in single-serving sizes, but most aren’t very good. Those BBQ-flavored cheese puffs… yeah, barbecue and “cheese” flavors don’t go together very well. Reduced-fat Cheez-Its… right, because that makes them so much healthier. Veggie straws… if you’re into them, then okay, you can go ahead and get those. Thank you for coming to my TED talk.